do you love him?
did. i did. the sunday a.m conversations he sacrificed to barely function at church a few hours later. how he escorted me to the car like a princess to my mom. always lecturing about my personal hygiene. wishing for my voice to be the last your hear before you fall out of consciousness. the piles of messages i'd woken up to because i'd accidentally fallen asleep into the call. how he tolerated my unhealthy habit of repeating songs until i hated them. the warmth of him by my side. his stupid story telling and ego. honestly, even though i'd promised myself that i can never allow another being to centre my world, i broke it.
do you miss him?
no, i don't miss him. i miss his attention because he's no longer the person i used to know. tension he omits at accidental eye-contact. is that necessary? i was sad, angry when he left but i understand a little better now. it was for our own good however, he doesn't not need to go out off his way to avoid me anymore. i wish for him to know.
what was his name?
i don't remember.
