M.I.A.

Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen:

Sydney

I lift another flier and smash the stapler against it, taking out my frustration. Nick shifts beside me, his ADHD never did make him the most focused person, but he's been good about not complaining about helping me with this. He trails me to another one of the lampposts sticking out of the boardwalk.

As he hands me another flier, I try not to read it, try not to look at my sister's face as I canvas it over a posting for someone looking for a roommate from two months ago.

"I'm hot," he says. "I'm gonna get something to drink. You want something?"

I glance over my shoulder and stare at him. He's got a sunburn. We've been out since this morning. I probably have one, too. He does look hot; hot, sweaty, miserable. He's doing this for me. For me and for Mia.

I look down at my red Converses. "Yeah. We should take a break, I guess."

His fingers find my free hand and he squeezes it. "Come on."

Nick leads me a little farther down the boardwalk, to where there are some picnic tables set up beside the burger stand. He steers me toward an empty one near the railing so that I look out over the beach while sitting under the shade of an umbrella. I plop down and, after a moment, I feel his fingers pry the stapler out of mine. I'm dimly aware of him placing it on top of the stack of fliers before his hands return to pull my backpack off of my shoulders. He's too good to me, taking care of me when I should be taking care of myself. I need to snap the hell out of this stupor, but I can't seem to move my arms.

Nick leans close and presses his lips against my forehead. Too hot in the summer sun, but good. His hands squeeze my shoulders. "I'll be back in a couple of minutes."

I nod, if only to let him know that I know he's there with me and I appreciate him.

I listen to his flip flops disappear into the press of bodies around us and stare out over the railing. It's a blue sky, bright sun day. Which means everyone and their cousin Vinny is at the beach.

Down there, the press of bare-skin bodies is thick, just like the press of bodies milling around behind me. Eating their fried food, drinking their slushies, playing games for cheap prizes, weaving in and out of shops and arcades and photo booths. I can hear the screams of the kids at the amusement and water park down at the next pier.

I bet they don't know about Mia. I bet they don't care. I didn't. Not until it was my own sister whose face was staring back at me from the missing person flier. It makes me hate them. But it makes me hate myself even more.

A familiar, tittering laugh from behind me catches my attention. Straightening, I turn around and scan the crowd.

And there she is. Tiana. And she's smiling and laughing, her arm intertwined in Will's. Both without a goddamned care in the world. They stop at the burger stand and flirt with each other as they talk about the menu.

My hearing seems to narrow in on that grating, stupid voice. My eyes on that careless, serpent smile. My heart speeds up and my blood turns to acid. I see red.

Before I know what I'm doing, I'm on my feet and running at Tiana. I sack her—making us both tumble to the dry, sandy wood. She twists underneath me, confused and trying to get up, but I don't let her. I hit her. Fist to fat cheek. And the noise her head makes when it smacks against the wood makes me feel good. So I do it again.