3 Girls and a Genie:
Three girls are stranded on an island. One brunette, one black-haired and a blonde. One day, the girls find a magic genie lamp. So they rubbed the side of the lamp and a green genie popped out. It said, "I will grant you each one wish." The brunette didn't take long to decide what she wanted. She said, "I wish I can go back home with my family." The genie sent her back home. The black-haired girl finally decided what she desired most. "I wish I can be back with my loved ones." she said. The genie granted her wish. She was also gone. The blonde was now all alone on the island. She took her time thinking of a good and reasonable wish to wish for. Finally, after 1 hour, the lone blonde decided her wish. She stated: "Genie, I wish, since I'm terribly lonely here on this island, for both my friends to come back."
3 Girls and a Genie THE SEQUEL:
So, the 3 exact girls are still stuck on an island. The brunette and the black-haired girl are mad at the blonde because she called them both back yesterday. So the blonde wanted to talk to them again, so to make it up to them, she went looking for another magic lamp. Later, she finds one. The brunette and the black-haired girl are overwhelmed with joy and glee that they have yet found another magic lamp. They rubbed the side of the lamp and a different genie from the previous lamp pops up. It says: "I will grant you one wish each, but it cannot be the same wish you wished for before." So they thought really hard for their maybe last wish they will ever receive. Suddenly the black-haired girl shouts out: "I wish for enough strength to swim back home." As soon as she said this, the genie appeared by her side and granted her wish. The black-haired girl began swimming home. The brunette wanted the same thing. "I wish my legs will be strong enough to swim all the way home." She started swimming back home. The blonde wanted the exact same thing and stated to the genie: "I want enough muscle in both my legs to swim back home." Her wish was granted and the genie disapeared. So the blonde started swimming. She only swam half way home when she realized she was getting tired. So she swam back to the island.
Pizza Field-Day:
The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
Cleaning-up:
One day, this blonde English teacher had to prepare a make-up test for her class. She was having such a hard time concentrating so she drew a design with her lipstick on her forehead.
Going LOOny-nutty:
This blonde lady was in the store's bathroom. After she was done doing her business, she of course went to go wash her hands. When her hands were done washing, she went over to the paper towel dispenser. She read the sign: "PULL AND TEAR." So she pulled a paper towel out, tore it up and threw it in the trash can.
Oink Oink goes the Blonde:
This blonde, one afternoon, was carrying a pig in her arms. This man, seeing her walk down the streets of New York, asked her, "won her at the raffle, eh?" And the pig responded: "Ya. How did you know?"
Cat, Dog, Potato:
One night, after a movie, 3 girls were walking home from the cinema. These girls girls were a redhead, brunette and a blonde. While they were walking home, they witnessed a murder. They saw the culprit kill the victim. They were now terrified, because the killer was now walking in their direction. The girls panicked and saw three empty potato sacks. They hid in them and closed the bag. The murderer was curious what was in the three potato sacks, because the last time he saw them, they were empty. He kicked the first bag. The brunette yelped a: "Woof woof!" "It's obviously a dog." said the man. He kicked the second bag. The redhead said: "Meow." "Pfft. It has to be a cat." said the killer. Now it was the blonde's turn. He kicked her bag and she let out: "Potato."
Paint the Town Red:
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For best results, put on two coats".
Blondes About Town:
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger.
First Blonde: "I can't seem to get this door unlocked! Second Blonde: "Well you better hurry up. It's starting to rain and the top is down!"
Tracks 'n' Field:
Three blondes were walking through a field when they came across a set of tracks. The first blonde looked down at the tracks and said, "I think they could be bird tracks."The second blonde went to look and said, "No, I think these are deer tracks."They stepped aside and the third blonde went over to the tracks. She looked down, then got run over by the train!
Time Flies By:
A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."
Dumber Blonde:
A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke. A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat. The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling, "You dumb blonde bimbo! It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!"
Jump, Jump, And Away:
A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump. Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend."But the blonde insisted saying, "No. A bet's a bet."Then the redhead said. "Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money. "The blonde replied. "Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!"
Look Out Below:
Question: If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?
Answer: The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!
