The storm is coming but I don't mind
People are dying, I close my blinds
All that I know is I'm breathing.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Four years previous:
"You're sure there was nothing there? You're absolutely sure?" Steve said, pacing around the Tower aimlessly. He'd been on the phone with Falcon for about an hour now. When the call had begun he'd been patient, listened carefully as Sam spoke. Now, however, he was irritated and yelled at his friend.
Natasha had been watching silently for a while. She was in plain view leaning against the wall, but wasn't sure if Steve noticed her when she walked in. The spy had been curious when she'd heard the national Hero being so uncharacteristically loud.
"I don't care Sam! There has to be some trace of him, some trail he left behind, and we're not going to stop until we find it!" Steve practically screamed into the receiver. In his anger he launched the tiny phone into the large floor-to-ceiling window in front of him. The crash made Natasha gasp.
"Steve?...... Steve?......" Sam's voice sputtered out of the ruined smart phone. The force of the throw had lodged it halfway in the thick plate glass. Natasha's eyebrows shot up in both surprise and shock. She'd known Steve was strong but she hadn't thought he was that strong.
"Impressive Steve." She said with only a hint of amusement in her voice. Steve sighed and turned away from the scene, his hands on his hips.
"I'm really not in the mood Natasha." He said almost annoyed. She didn't take it personally, given the conversation she'd just eavesdropped on. The Widow had a good idea what it was about.
She sighed and moved to where he stood, placing a hand on the Star Spangled Man's shoulder. He turned to face her.
"Steve, I can't let you do this to yourself anymore." Natasha said bluntly. She took one of his his large hands in both of hers.
"Look at what it's doing to you, what he's doing to you." She looked into Steve's deep, deep eyes. Those eyes had seen so many horrible things. They swam with loss, with hurt. "He's gone Steve."
The soldier couldn't look at her. Tears he'd been holding back since the day his best friend fell were spilling out over his cheeks. He was embarrassed, and he could feel the blush on his cheeks, but in that moment he didn't care.
"But that's the thing Natasha, he isn't gone. He was never gone." Steve sobbed now, fighting to finish. "He's been alive this whole time, and they've been doing... Horrible things to him, this whole time and I've... I've.." Natasha took him in her arms as wave after wave of grief crashed into him. She felt a little silly as she rocked this giant of a man, but she did it anyway. For him, for Steve, she would do this.
"I'll find him Steve. I will find Bucky."
