"Money Honey I'm home!" Makoto called as he kicked the door down, just like he did every day. They would always just by a new door, because Byakuya owned all of the money in the world.
All of it.
Makoto gasped as he teleported to the bedroom and a horrifying sight played out in front of him.
Byakuya was cheating on him.
WITH SOME CHEAP WAD OF MONEY!
Byakuya's eyes widened as he noticed his lover's presence, pulling the sheets up to hide his strong, muscular chest and toned body.
The money did nothing to hide its shame, striking a confident, naked pose on the bed. It was obvious they had multiple rounds. Coins were scattered everywhere on the money-green bed that was also made out of solid gold money. "Naegi-kun-" Byakuya rushed to explain, but was interrupted. "I don't want to hear it... due to my spectacular seduction skills, only one person could have slept with that money..." Makoto raised a hand and pointed at himself, then at the money, and finally at Byakuya Togami himself.
"YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE!" He cried in all caps, Byakuya's face distorting into a look of horror. "How did you figure me out, Naegi-kun?" He asked, as(s)tonished.
"What the fuck is going on here." Kyoko said, no emotion in her voice as she appeared from the pastel goth realm where she usually resides. "Togami-kun cheated on me!" Makoto sobbed directly into Kyoko's breasts. She shot a demonic glance at Byakuya, revealing her true, satanic goth squid princess form to him as a warning not to hurt any more generic cliche protagonists.
Suddenly, a braid lasso shot out around Byakuya's waist, and, defying probably a few laws of Physics, Toko flew over to him.
"WOOHOO! RIDE 'EM COWBOY!" She cried as she made her entrance, then took 5 minutes to untangle the braid lasso from a frustrated Byakuya.
"Now, don't you dare touch my lovely Master ever again, ya hear?!" She demanded, hugging Byakuya, who squirmed like a wiggly worm or a sneaky snek.
"I'm suing for sexual harassment." Byakuya stated. "Well why don't I just go all out then?" Toko giggled.
"I'm leaving you and Toko to be alone. I can't believe you'd cheat on me! With MONEY!" Makoto cried, spitting on the money.
"LEEEDLELEEDLELEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The money cried as it melted into hot metal, like the Wicked Witch of The West.
"Shit I think I just killed someone." Makokoloco said as he hid behind Kyoko Kirigeary. "I MUST PROTECT THE CLICHE PROTAGONIST! SQUID PRINCESS DEMON THINGY POWERS AWAY!" Kyoko declared and her hair became wing-tentacles as she gripped Naegi by his ahoge and flew to the Pastel Goth realm, leaving Byakuya and Toko alone.
"Let's go re-enact a fanfiction I wrote." Chicken Tokko Masala cooed. "If I may inquire... what fanfiction did you write?" Backula Dracula asked apprehensively. "Fifty Shades of Grey." Toko grinned.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO" Byakuya cried off into the distance as the camera slowly panned away, collapsing in the rain that appeared out of nowhere that was also money.
THE END. I'M A WEIRDO.
