A Roses Throne

Chapter 2

September 4th

Dear Diary

I feel so weak, ready to break down. I hate my life! I just said something that more then a hundred teens say every day.

I hate how I feel. It hurts to thinks about my life. When I think about my life, it makes me shiver. I don't know what else to do right, I just need to get it out for a while since the feelings gonna come back anyways.

I could say it's not fair but I can't cause it won't be fair to the others like me. I wish I could meet people like me. Some one I could share my pain with.

But whatever. Let me tell you a little about me. I don't believe in love. Why? Cause I never received it from anybody. Except from dancing and fighting, but that doesn't count. I don't care what people think about me.

My favorite color is red and black. Red cause of my pain and black for..... well for like sometimes I just want to blackout when I can't handle life anymore.

Don't feel bad for me, I hate other people's pity, it pisses me off. I like swimming and running . When I have some free time I usually shoot hoops or read a book.

Where I'm from is an ocean, beach, river lake, pool, pond, even a bath tub. In the water, I feel like there are no rules, except for not drowning obviously.

But like I said no rules, from the parents, teachers, or any one else. I feel like I live in, way back in the past you know when there where slaves.

I feel like I'm not free from this world. I feel like I'm only let out of m cage to work and he right back in at the end of the day.

When I grow up I'm a have a house with an indoor pool you know, just be floating on the surface all night long and when I get tiered I'm just going to go under water knowing that on all sides of my body I'm surrounded by my 'friends'. Closing my eyes letting Eminem's voice fill up my head.

I had an older brother. Keyword 'had'. He was my best friend, there wasn't nothing he couldn't fix. Making me smile, laugh, and everything. I would go running to him all the time, after FB( fat bastard ) made me feel bad about my self( nothing physical) FB is the stepfather. Just makes me feel like crap inside and out.

FB would make us feel bad. I miss my brother so much. Now i have nobody to run to, nobody to talk to, nobody to share my pain. In case your wondering is he dead? To answer you no he is not dead.

He's still here , he just changed. You know how people change and stuff but you don't want that happening, but like most things you want in life you don't get. Closing my eyes for a second thinking about before.

He use to be so sweet, so caring. But that changed when dad died. Now I just plaster the fake-st smile I could master up on my face. At school people thought I was a happy person, hell if u saw me you'd think I'm a very happy person.

To bad they don't now the truth. Some times I want them to know the truth. My mom thinks I'm very pretty. I have an olive skin tone with big eyes. Long black hair. Some times looking in the mirror I think I'm so beautiful.

So beautiful that I am stupid to be jealous of the other girls my age. But FB always....... tells me the opposite.

I close my diary. As we step out side of the airport, I start to look around, I see a bunch of people at one side of the street.

They're all holding signs with names on it. Scanning carefully, looking for the Ryans. After awhile of looking around Jake taps me on my shoulder and points to a different direction, following his gaze I see a men standing next to a ............. Oh my god, next to a Lamborgini Murcielago!

.

And he was dressed in all black, black hair, black eyes, black everything from head to toe. Except for his skin. I think he's mexican.

He looks like he's got something better to do. I find out a minute later that Alexandro is our personal driver, I guess Sally has money. Once he sees us approaching he takes his sunglasses and gives us a tight smile, He probably thinks were a bunch of snubs.

" Hola Allie and Jake, I'm Alexandro and I'm your persanol driver"

He has a nice acsent. He opens the trunk and puts our bags in.

Watching him secretly, I study his face. He look like he's about... 21 years old. He has light brown eyes with long lashes. His jaw has a nice angle making him look very atractive.

With a straight long nose, his lips are kinda red.

It looks like he had a cup of kool-aid before picking us up. I bet if the girls at my old school saw him, the'd be heads over heels for him. he opens the door for us.

Jake steps in first with out saying thanks.

I walk up to the door and say, "Thanks but I think I can manage opening a door next time". not waiting for a reply I slide in and shut the door.

I plug in my ear phones and then I selact my favorite song by Eminem, Leting his voice blast through my ears I close my eyes.

You ever get that feeling that someone is watching you, that is how i feel now.

Slowly cracking my left eye, I catch Alexandro staring at me trough his review mirror.

He's smiling, watching him more closely he wink then I finally realize that I've been caught.

He turns his gaze back on the rode and After a while I fall a sleep.