Kagerou Project Drabble - KidoKano

Kano was at the point of no return.

He'd begun having nightmares- about losing the Mekakushi Dan, about hurting his friends, about drowning in his own lies- and ended up in the kitchen at three in the morning making tea, contemplating how he was going to sleep.

AND SUDDENLY BUZZ ALDRIN CAME DOWN FROM THE GAP IN THE CEILING THAT WASN'T THERE FIVE MINUTES AGO, BEARING IN HIS ARMS HIS FUTURE GIRLFRIEND KIDO. KANO GASPED.

"OH WOW," HE SAID. "I KNEW WE BELONGED TOGETHER, TSUBOMI. LET'S MAKE OUT. I'M DEPRESSED AND CAN'T SLEEP."

KIDO HADN'T IN THE SLIGHTEST CLUE AS TO WHAT WAS GOING ON, SO- NATURALLY- SHE PUNCHED HIM IN THE GUT AND KNOCKED HIM OUT.

"YOU CAN SLEEP NOW, CAN'T YOU, JACKASS?"

KANO WASN'T REALLY ASLEEP. HE WAS WAITING FOR HER TO BEND OVER AND CHECK OUT HIS FACE TO MAKE SURE HE WASN'T BLEEDING INTERNALLY, SO HE COULD SNEAK IN A KISS.

AND HE DID. BUT IT WASN'T KIDO THAT HE KISSED. IT WAS ANOTHER DAMN ASTRONAUT, THE ONE CALLED NIEL ARMSTRONG.

"THESE FREAKING AMERICANS!" KANO SCREAMED. THEN HE DIED. THE END.