Finding Bloody Mary

Chapter 1

I can see her sweet smile when she looked my way. Then she grabbed me by the hand and dragged me. I can hear laughter echoing from the dark. Her long hair bounced on and off as we run. I wondered. Will this be us if I just stayed. I know that I'm being fooled right now by my own imagination this didn't really happened. How I wish. Then the shitty part kicks in. Realization, reality. Fucking reality. Soon I can hear the humming engine, I slowly opened my eyes. That was it. Every single time. Whenever I had the chance to escape reality I will always find myself with Mary.

" This is the captain speaking we'll be landing in Manila in about fifteen minutes. Thank you".

Thank God. I've been longing for those words for about Eight hours now. My back is already sore and aching. Finally.

I checked the nearby window. Beyond this clouds hid my precious past. My early years. So much memory I wonder how it'll turn out. I'll be home for five months. I wonder, will I be able to fulfill what I came here for or am I just wasting my time.

Slowly I closed my eyes. I let myself doze off for little. I can't explain what I'm feeling right now. Happy to be home but memories seemed to make me a sad. As if I'm bathing from the warmth of the sun but freezing inside. There's this uneasiness inside that I feel. Fear. I feel frightened of what is waiting ahead, Maybe the Mary that I'll find won't be the same Mary that I've lost. And what if, what if I won't even find her. Lost with the unending questions inside my head I let myself rest. Then, the darkness devoured me.

It's already passed 2 P.M. when I arrived at the hotel reservation. I got my luggage checked but I don't feel the bed yet. As if Jet Lag is not even a word in my vocabulary. Well I just don't feel sleeping yet. I went out for a walk. I don't really know where I'll go. I just feel to go where my feet will bring me.

I found myself watching the sunset. At a rooftop of an unknown building. It was a blur. I don't know how I got here or when. All I know is that Its so fucking beautiful. I miss this. Before, I will always have my mind cleared just by watching the sunset. As if I am being Isolated from the world. At least for a few minutes. I will just stand there staring at the setting sun engulfed by the warmth of it. No sounds. No thoughts. Just nothing. Then after, everything will rush down through me. Noise of the distant traffic. things that I need to worry about, Homework, Loans, Bills, Everything. But the best part is that it'll every problem will be back with answers. I always watch the sunset to find my resolutions. Just like now.

I drew out my phone from my pocket. Then I stared at it. The most precious of all my riches. The only picture of Mary that I have. Then It all came clear to me. At this point of life, Now that I attained what I dreamed of the only thing that is missing is Mary. Now, She's my resolution and I came back to find her. It'll be long journey. It might hard. But, I won't stop until I find her.