Jealousy Best Served Devious (Clash Of Cliches Book 1)

Prologue

DISCLAIMER

This story contains an excessive usage of clichés and should not, in all honesty, be taken seriously. And when I say excessive, I really mean it.

I OWN NOTHING YOU RECOGNISE (AND SOME THINGS YOU DON'T.) Please don't steal my work. I worked really hard on this and I don't want to read the exact same story on any other site with the names changed. Not cool.

© hotcheri.

Prologue.

Some people suffer for art. Being the most inartistic person in the world (I can't even draw a straight line with a ruler) I am categorically not one of them. But Iam one of those people who have to suffer for what they believe in. And what do I believe in, you may ask?

I'll tell you what (or should I say whom) - Ryder Jefferson.

For those of you who don't know, Ryder Jefferson is perfection. Honey brown hair combed just so, a tan that could make the bronzest surfer weep with envy, abs that even The Situation would kill to have and the most flawlessly sculpted face I have ever seen. He's the captain of our school's varsity basketball team and the head of the debate team (looks, brawn and brains- the most lethal combination).

And he just so happens to be the object of my love (unrequited) for the past six years.

Pathetic, yes. Useless on my part, yes. Stoppable, no.

People (including my very own mother, best friend and the pregnant cashier at the grocery store) think Ryder's way out of my league and that he'll never see me as anything but his Science lab partner and the girl he copies off of but I say don't they watch movies?

Every teen movie out there has an ordinary girl falling for a hot, popular jock storyline. And if a girl can get it in with a vampire (I'm looking at you, Twilight), I'm pretty sure I'm capable of dating the hottest guy in school. It's the oldest (and my favorite) cliché out there- normal girl (that would be me) dates hot jock (that would be Ryder). And with my Plan of Action outlined below, it's only a matter of time before Ryder and I get together. Preferably before Prom because he has to be my date. I've been dreaming about Prom night for my entire life (I'm not obsessive or anything- well, maybe just a little bit).

That being said, I now present to you:

Makayla Bailey's Plan of Action.

Written by Makayla and checked by Shelley (who couldn't stop laughing for some reason)

Goal- Be Ryder Jefferson's girlfriend before prom night.

Cliché of choice- Normal girl dates popular jock.

Timeline with aforesaid jock- as follows:

Age 11 and nine months- Meet Ryder for the first time. Decide that he is 'The One' and will be my date to the prom in 6 years. Get a smile from him when I lend him my pencil. Tell my heart to be still.

Age 12- Invite Ryder to my very first co-ed party. Disaster. Throw up in his beautiful hair after eating one too many hotdogs and being subjected to those humiliating birthday bumps. Grossed out, he leaves. Cry myself to sleep.

Age 12 and two days- Hear from a mutual friend that Ryder thinks I'm a freak because of the whole party incident. Cry in school bathroom. BFF Shelley tells me to apologize.

Age 12 and three days- Apology accepted. Dance a happy dance of relief. People laugh but I don't care. All is right with the world.

Age 12 and five months- Ryder doesn't show for school. Worried with fear. What's happened to him? Spend whole day staring at door or his desk, as though he'll materialize out of thin air. No such luck. Go to teacher after school, offering to go give him his homework, just to find out what's wrong. Teacher says he's moved to New York. Manage to make it home before I faint.

Age 12 and five months to age 13 and six months- Pine over my heartbreaking loss. Go on first date. Think of Ryder.

Age 13 and seven months- Tall, hot guy enters our class. Teacher announces 'please welcome back Ryder Jefferson''. Swoon. Spend the whole day with goofy grin on face, exacerbated by shoulder punch and 'hi' from Ryder at lunch. My baby is back!

Age 13 and nine months- Discover Ryder making out with my then friend Lauren in supply closet. Cry.

Age 14 and one month- Audition for the female lead in school play because Ryder is the male lead. Bomb. Get kicked out.

Age 14 and two months- Have first kiss (alas, not with Ryder). Is disgusted by the amount of spit in fellow kissers' mouth. Placate myself with the thought that my first kiss with Ryder will be the stuff that dreams are made of.

Age 14 and four months- Try to impress Ryder and his boys with a shallow dive at the community pool. Lose my bikini top in process. Boys laugh. Get asked out by Ryder's BFF. Refuse.

Age 14 and seven months- Ryder asks me to be is study buddy. Elated. Study together for three months until an astonishing amount of people tell me Ryder is just using me to do his homework for him.

Age 15- Ryder brings his girlfriend to my birthday party. Ruins my year. Go on a date with his aforementioned BFF out of spite. Date doesn't go well, due to the fact that Ryder and girlfriend tag along, making out at every opportunity. Decide that revenge doesn't pay.

Age 15 and two months- Tired of me mooning around the house listening to 'The one I gave my heart to' by Aaliyah, mom sets me up with the pizza delivery boy. Date the pizza delivery boy for eight months. Why, I don't know.

Age 15 and ten months- Break-up with pizza delivery boy citing irreconcilable differences. Find out that Ryder is now single.

Age 15, ten months and 5 days- Throw out all my unappealing clothes and hit the mall to revamp my wardrobe and wow Ryder. Run into him at the mall. He buys me coffee. Yes! Spill said coffee in his lap due to nerves. Crap. Back at square one. Apologize.

Age 15, ten months and 6 days- Apologize again. Ryder asks me for homework help. I do his homework while he plays football with the boys. Keep it a secret from Shelley, who would undoubtedly be furious, not only because she would think he was using me, but because I was probably getting most answers wrong.

Age 16- Go to Junior Prom and Ryder asks me to dance in exchange for doing his American History paper. On cloud nine.

Age 16 and five months- Start dating dad's BFF's son in despair. Wonder what it will take for Ryder to realize that we were meant to be together forever (not in a stalker kind of way).

Age 17- Become Ryder's lab partner. Finally have chance to wow him. Remember that most clichéd romances start with a project, tutoring or an assignment and end in love. Realize the only way is up, baby, for Ryder and me now.

Prognosis (by Shelley Montri) - not promising.

Shelley thinks that my 'obsession' with Ryder isn't healthy, but I say it's not unhealthy if it's love. She'll see. I'll make her and everyone who ever doubted me eat their words. Nobody's gonna stand in my way.

And I'm not obsessive. Really.