Now I'm just stalling (MatPat fanfic)

chapter 1

I sat in English only half listening to the lecture my teacher was giving. he was probably whining about how iPhones are killing our youth, or sport ball, or something else I didn't care about. The reason I wasn't fully listening, opting to instead to pick out key words like "assignment," "due," and "big trouble missy," was that video games are much more fun. I wasn't playing one in class of course, I'm not that edgy. I was just thinking through the plot of Skyward Sword and trying to poke holes in it. the complexity of time travel and paradoxes was much more interesting than what the teacher was prattling on about. Class was ending soon, so I quietly closed my notebook and put it in my bag. Sadly, despite my stealth, the teacher noticed.

"Mary Jane," he said and I winced. That wasn't even my name. it was just Mary, but the other kids decided to add Jane as a joke. I'm still not sure if the joke was 'haha, marijuana' or 'haha, Spider-Man's girlfriend.' Anyways, this doofus teacher had decided to join in on the fun, I guess. The part of me that has nothing but loathing for this guy, is inclined to think he saw it as an opportunity to make a weed joke, and didn't think twice about the effects that getting bullied by your teacher can have on a student. Contrary to 'popular' belief, no it does not toughen them up. Anyway, he said, "don't put your stuff away, the bell hasn't even rang yet."

I sat there stewing, hoping I wouldn't have to say anything. "s-sorry" I finally muttered hoping that would end the confrontation.

"You should be. everyone should wait until after the bell rings. I get it when you have to get to your next class, but do you really have to rush to lunch?" He said whining some more. "you have 25 minutes and all you have to do is eat and socialize. you have extra time to be nice to your teachers and wait until class is over to leave."

Then the bell rang and I ran out of the classroom, careful not to let him see me. I did not want to make this a big deal. I got to the lunch room and bought a burger and diet coke. Yeah, the school food sucked, but at least they couldn't do anything to the diet coke. I walked across the school to my locker so that I could eat in peace. then I sat down and started noshing.

"Hey, Mary Jane, you look lonely. wanna come have lunch with us?" A girl said, stopping as she walked by me. I wasn't sure what her name was. Jessica? Or Abigail? I didn't want to say no but I didn't really want to eat lunch with her. Plus it felt unwarranted. What was I doing be invited to lunch by someone who's name I couldn't remember?

"Um... ok, I guess," I said almost automatically. I got up and followed them to a classroom and sat at a desk that was slightly of from the group. they started talking drama in their friend group. I really didn't care. The closest I got to being invested was when someone said something about catching things and, due to word association, I was tempted to sing the Pokemon theme song. I didn't, just didn't seem right.

"Hey, Mary Jane, you know you can join in the conversation." What's her name said looking at me expectantly. 

"Uh, I'm fine." I really didn't want to say anything. My face started heating up and I got a catch of embarrassment in my throat. "Um, I have to go to the bathroom!" And then I ran. I let that classroom fade in the dust behind me. luckily the bathroom was empty. I needed to be alone. I'm not good with people.

I made it through the rest of the school day relatively uneventfully. That night I hung out in my room watching youtube and playing video games. I only left to grab some of the pizza my parents ordered for dinner. I also did some homework. So basically, every day ever. it was starting to get pretty late when my mom called me into her room.

"Mary," she said. 

"What's up?" I said as I waltzed in.

"Um..." She started sounding shaky. "Your... Going to be living with some one else for a while..."

"What? Why?" I said, already flying off the handle. "Who am I gonna live with?"

"Your..." her eyes shifted from the wall to the floor, "brother."

"I don't- I have a brother? couldn't you at least say that first? Since when do I have a brother? What the heck?"

"Wait, d-" she hunched over and took a deep breath, "don't get ahead of me... y- he lives in California a- and..." Her hand clutched the bedding. "you're adopted."

Suddenly time stood still. she wasn't my mother. none of this was mine. this wasn't where I belonged. and what about my real parents? Where were they? Did they not want me? Were they dead? What the hell happened?

"We... found your birth parents and..." she said, slowly pulling me back to reality. "well... you have a brother. the situation wasn't made perfectly clear to me but... they raised him and... couldn't raise you for whatever reason. maybe it was money, I don't know. still though we couldn't have kids on our own so your father and I went looking and found their perfect little baby girl. you were so cute back then. we took you home and... that was it. but now, well, your brother lives on his own now and... we thought you should get to know each other."

"What have I got to lose..." I muttered, not thinking much about what I was saying.

"The plane leaves tomorrow, you should probably pack your things."

"Um... yeah, I guess I will," I said as I traipsed back to my room. I collapsed on my bed and sat there, unmoving, as if to check that I was still breathing properly. I turned my head to look at my dresser. long ago I'd given up on using all the space it provided, and fit all my clothes into one drawer. I looked around my room for something to pack. the fact of the matter was, that I didn't own much and what little I did I'd already packed away, ready to go at a moments notice.

To tell the truth I'd been dreaming of running away from home for awhile, and now I lay in a nearly empty room, having been told I was going to leave. it may have been on their terms and it may have only been for a while, but I was still getting to leave.

I went and grabbed a suitcase from a closet in the hall, put it on my bed and started parsing through the few things I hadn't already packed. a link amibo, a small NSP poster, a hair brush I'd been using, a Winnie the Pooh stuffed animal, my iPod Classic and my laptop. My most prized possessions. With the exception of the hair brush.

my glance traced the room to see what, if anything I'd missed. my video games immediately caught my eye. I only had Wii games, since that was the only console I owned. I didn't know what to do. consoles are difficult to take on flights and I wasn't brave enough to deal with that extra burden. I didn't know If my brother would have a Wii and if he did he might already have all eight of the games I owned, making it a waste of luggage space. I hesitated but decided to grab the CD case for 'the Best of Pooh and Heffalumps too' and put 'Kirby's Epic Yarn' and 'Mario Galaxy' in with it. Last before going to bed I took all my dirty clothes and put them through the laundry so I could pack them. I rooted out all my bags specifically designed to fit in that suitcase, and put them in with my 'most prized possessions' while waiting to put the load in the dryer. I felt weird. Less empty maybe? That was good I think, but it just seemed to make me feel more anxious. I ended up throwing a lot of that anxiety into a session of vigorous flossing. I don't know if it was that or the day I'd had, but luckily, I slept pretty well that night.