f*ck it • joji miller

4

Joji went into his bedroom to change, and so did I. I hadn't brought that many swimsuits to New York because I was planning on buying some when I got here. I only had two at the moment. One was just a simple black bikini and the other was a dark green one. I decided that I'd wear the first one that I could find in my closet. So, after digging around, I found the black one, and then put it on. I grabbed my phone and headed out into the hallway.

(her swimsuit is pictured above)

Shit, I forgot a towel.

"Do you need a towel?" Joji asked, basically reading my mind. He had just stepped out of his room with dark blue swim shorts on. I tried not to stare, but he had a six pack.

Damn.

"Uh, yeah, do you have an extra?" I said, fiddling with my phone case. He quickly looked me up and down, and then he nodded. He retreated to his room, probably to go find a towel. Once he came out, he smiled at me. "You're ready, yeah?" I reply with "yes", and then he lead me outside into the hallway.  The brief walk to the elevator was quiet. Once we stepped inside the elevator, I immediately noticed that the floor under my bare feet was freezing. I probably should have worn flip-flops, or shoes in general.

The elevator chimed when we had reached the top level. And, when the doors opened, I saw the coolest pool ever. Well, not ever, but this was the coolest pool I've ever seen in an apartment building. There were two diving boards and a slide. The pool itself was a relatively large size and there was even a drink bar on the side of it, which was probably only open during the day because we were the only ones up here.

"Cool, huh?" he commented. Although the pollution from the city lights blocked the stars, the moon still shined on the water's reflection. "This is beautiful!" I squealed, setting my towel and phone down on a pool chair. "We have to have a party up here sometime." I suggested. He looked at me and nervously scratched his head. "Yeah, I've been meaning to do that since summer started, actually." I started to walk towards him. I put my hand out for him to take, and asked, "You aren't a pussy, right?" With my other hand I pointed to one of the diving boards — the high dive. He chucked and took my hand. "Hell no." I made my way to the ladder while Joji followed. "You first, or me?" I asked, letting go of his hand. "I'll go." he decided, and then he started to climb up the ladder. I watched and started to feel nervous.

Why the fuck am I doing this?!

Truth is, I had never been off of a diving board before. I know, I know — that sounds crazy, but there weren't many pools around where I grew up.

Oh God, why am I doing this?!

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud splash. I guess that was my cue.

I reluctantly started to climb the ladder (slowly I might add). I gripped the handles for my life, and kept my eyes trained on my feet to make sure that I wouldn't miss a step and fall to my death. Once I reached the top step, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I opened them to the most breathtaking view of my life. I was surrounded by dark buildings that were lit up with lights. It was like a sea of different colors that never ended. I stared at the buildings, the lights, and I could even see the street below. In that moment, I decided that I was going to explore every inch of this city. In my head, I vowed to go to every bar, every club, every restaurant, just...everywhere. I tried to see as far out as I could, but it seemed that the buildings were endless, and they only got smaller and smaller the farther they were away from me. I stared at the moon, that shone brightly even through the clouds and pollution. Then, I looked down. The water was beautifully lit. I turned my attention to Joji, who was treading water and was staring up at me silently. Although it was humid outside, there was a slight breeze that tossed around my hair. In that moment, I felt perfectly calm and perfectly happy. Then reality hit me like a truck.