My Thoughts, Exactly.

This is just something I wrote on my thoughts on love... There's no intent behind it, I'm just kinda bored and... yeah lol :) I might turn it into more, but like different topics for each chapter... ya never know?

 

(And this is an informal kinda thing, Yes you'll see a few lol's thrown in there. I'm not trying to be Khyla the Author, I'm just trying to be Khyla.... the rambler? Lol, you might not understand anything I'm saying at first, but at the end, I'll sum it up, and hopefully it'll make sense? :P  )

 

First, I wanna touch on TEEN love...

 

I'm a teen... turning 16 in less than month in fact ;D, but I have mixed thoughts on teen love.

 

Right now, I just want to focus on having a good time, enjoying my life, making the most memories with my friends, while also making sure my future is secure... grades, and whatnot. When I was in elementary and middle school, I had boyfriends... but they weren't actually boyfriends... they were just guys that held the title of boyfriend, and I, the title of girlfriend... but we were in Elem/Middle School!! We weren't actually doing anything (At least I wasn't lol) we only said things to sound cool... 

I'm 15, and I've had ONE official boyfriend and that was my freshman year. We lasted for 2 months... but we didn't actually act like a couple... I mean, he was an OKAY boyfriend, but there was just... nothing there, so we broke up and now we're best friends :D No I wasn't in love, people would always ask me if I loved him, including him, and I always said no... I mean, I was sick and got sent to the nurse, and my friends came to check on me... but did my own boyfriend? Nah. I mean, I know that we had only been dating for like a week or two... but still yo! Not even a text to ask if I was okay, tsk tsk tsk. 

Idk, I just have so many examples of "Teen Love Gone Wrong" that whenever I see teens (especially girls) falling head over heels for the person they've been dating for a WEEK, I just wanna smack them and then shake them yelling "DO YOU EVEN KNOW THEIR MIDDLE NAME YET???????????!!!!!!" Ugh, lol. 

 

But is it weird that I kinda wanna experience a heart break?? 

 

I mean, I'm starting to think I'm heartless. When my ex broke up with me I realized that I wasn't really broken up about it, just curious... other than that I was like.... Mmkay, Let's be friends!!! :D At the thought of breakups, PERIOD, I'm just like... Humph, on to the next one I guess. 

I just don't get emotionally attached, but all my friends know that I'm just a hopeless romantic.. And yes, I would like to fall in love... Love as in real, gut wrenching, hopeless, everlasting kinda love... but as a teen, I want TEEN love.

 

When I say TEEN love, I mean fun, blush inducing, carefree, drama-free love. It's just me, and him. No third parties, no crying my heart out at night, and definitely not a off and on relationship. Just a simple teen romance. I just wanna experience it. It's not like I'm unattractive and I feel that I'll never get a chance to feel that kinda love. It's that I'm very picky in who I date, and high school guys are only looking for ONE thing. Sex. Even the guys that seem nice, end up breaking up with a girl because she wouldn't put out >.> I'm a virgin and I plan to stay that way until I finish school completely, including college, and maybe even till I'm married, who knows? So yeah, add sexless kinda teen love, to that too ;D

 

And also, high school guys are just so... superficial, it's crazy. I mean, I know us girls are too, some more than others... but at my school, guys are more worried about their "Swag", and yes, presentation is important, but come on now! No guy should spend more time getting dressed than his girl friend ^_________-

 

Lol that's why I'm so attracted to Senior guys! OMG there's just something about them... they're grown up now, most of them are past the childish games, and most just wanna have a little fun before they graduate, and they're CONFIDENT to boot :) Confidence is just a major thing with me, isn't it with everyone? But just give me one that isn't a man-whore, that's nice, attractive, and has a good head on his shoulders, and my teen romance will be complete :D But then it also sucks because they're seniors... I'm only a sophmore.. they'll be the leaving the hell that is high school, and I'll be stuck here.... Sigh..

 

Lol I feel like I'm just setting myself up for heartbreak though... Then again I DID mention that I wanted to experience a broken heart... it's weird I know, but honestly, have you ever felt the same??

 

That's a legit question, btw...