Salam i really wanted to write about how The rules of islam are there to protect us and what are the consequences if we do not follow them this isnt about a sin or its punishment simply about life. As im a teenager (girl) i wanted something to be related to it . Its simply about a muslim girl and a boy how they meet and things happen . Its the girl POV
And how she's trying to set things right
Its been a few months maybe a few days or hours since I left with a hope that you will understand , a hope that you will change , a hope that our story will have a end . Ive been praying . Ive been praying for you . Ive been praying for us . I promised right? . Still remember how you begged me to stay , how you said please and how you tried but you need to know that it wasnt meant to be . Im sorry I just couldnt stay . I made a promise and I dont break promises
I made a promise to my Allah that ill finish it off, that this time ill lose you no matter how hard it is . I know you are way too stubborn to admit it but it wasnt right. It was poison , a poison which gave pleasure but provided it only for a short time . As the time passed it did its job , it started to strangle us , controlling us and we didnt even noticed. I cursed you in order to satisfy myself , blamed it on you , didnt even realised that im killing myself slowly instead , making scars on each and every part of my body , hurting myself . I cried and cried and cried , you were chaos to my thoughts. I hate your effect on me. The abulia was getting me . Then finally something hit me , it wasnt your fault
Those times when our conversations were unstoppable, days and nights didn't made a difference . It was like our own beautiful world but as the fate wanted , it was wrecked . We together blew it up . The poison slowly flowed in my veins and damaged me. A week passed and things started to get clearer. Those moments with you I was lost in you. But then something was missing, it was like my life was full of happiness but still completely hallow. Nothing really changed between us but still everything felt ugly , a hatred had found its place in me , i fought with you and was left broken hearted .Didnt understand it ...i wanted this my whole life these sweet conversations , spending my time with a
specific person .Talking to him but after the fight when i was left alone it got to me.....I left Allah for you. In those days I prayed in the most inappropriate ways , changed the path which will lead me to Jannah, caused my Iman to be weak .I really didn't do much ibadat before you came but the amount of time i did... it felt good . It warmed up my heart . I realised that ive lost that ability , my heart its cold , its hard. Our realtionship was haraam , it was undesirable in Allah's eyes, that is why it was wrecking, thats the reason why everything led to destruction . It was shaytaan . Shaytaan made this relationship. I was zoned out but when truth snapped its fingers in front of me I was ruined , felt like I didnt knew how to feel anymore . And here i was crying in the corner at how stupid i was , at how i lost my faith because of this , at how I lost Allah because of this. Allah said that we humans are weak , He informed us of the rules He made , now I realise those rules were there to protect me . My love for you was haraam . We were an illusion . I made the mistake of loving this illusion. I made this world my paradise . Forgot that this world is a prisoner for the believers . I thought maybe just maybe Allah would forgive me after all Shaytaan doesn't win when we sin but he wins when we think that Allah won't forgive us. I prayed , begged for His mercy and true was it that Allah is ar Rahman He gave me a chance, it took time but slowly The pain was getting less. I was out of that hell , I was out of the illusion I was living. Thanks to Allah I knew how badly I need Islam . I prostrated before my lord , it gave me peace , I cried infront of my lord, it gave me peace , I made myself weak infront of my lord , it gave me peace and the best thing It healed me:) Ive seen people fall in love . Always have noticed how lively they become, how positive it is . Always thought that love completes people and how beautiful it is , I wanted to feel it , I wanted to see the outer side of it , the perfect side but never thought how deep and wrecking the inner part is . That...that was my mistake , I made it my life , I made it my goal, I considered it as a place where I desperately wanna be. Forgot the words of wisdom
"never lose the Akhira for this world " . Indeed Allah is the merciful , the kind. He showed me the straight path
"اهدنا الصرط المستقيم"
"Show us the staright path"
How I wish that Allah had formed this relationship, that it was halaal . How I wish that Just once I said Alhamdulillah , my Salah were properly performed by me . I really didn't cared about it , I let Shaytaan in but not anymore .I know the way and now I wanna show you the way . Allah gives you something bad it means that u didn't talk to Allah for a while and He misses you. He is calling us . We cant leave Him. That is why I left. I want both of us to get closer to Allah and that isn't possible if we are together. It still hurts thinking how deeply i was lost in you but then Allah puts a smile on my face and I realise that I did something for Him , that if I suffer a little more I will earn His pleasure. Maybe I gave you a hope again that we will be together if Allah wills but somewhere deep inside we both know that our Decemeber will never come. Maybe its hurting you too . These seconds will turn into minutes , minutes into days, days into months and months into years. We will forget each other and move on In sha Allah .Allah will forgive us and this pain and suffering will be worth it. At least when the time comes we can proudly say to Allah that we chose HIM instead of US.
-Unknown
