It all started with the divorce. First mom lost her job, then the drinking started. Finally, dad snapped and broke it off. I haven't seen him since.
Mom smokes non stop and is always either drunk or high. She never has time for me anymore.
Her new boy-toy Derek is always over, and when he isn't, mom is out at some bar or something. I actually enjoy having him over. He's really nice to me, and he keeps my mom occupied.
I go to Terrence elementary, the only public school in our small little town, and it sucks big time. My best and only friend, Marie is the only thing I have to look forward to every day. We have been friends since the second grade.
"MOM! I'm home!" I yelled as I walked in the front door, slamming it behind me. The whole apartment shook.
"Your mom just went to the grocery store. She said she'll be back in an hour or two." Derek said, stepping out of the shadows.
"Ok, I'm just gonna go do my homework then." I said, slowly backing down the hall. My eye locked with Derek's the whole way.
When I finally reached my room, I closed the door, and went to lock it. Wait. Where'd the lock go? In the place of the old handle, was a shiny new one that didn't have a lock.
I walked over to my desk that was shoved in the corner of the room, and quickly finished my homework, dreading every minute. Yelling down the hall, I said "Tell mom I'm in the shower!!"
Grabbing the towel off the back of the door, I walked into the bathroom. I went to turn on the shower in the cramped stall, and I tested the water. The only good thing about the shower was the fog stained glass, making it impossible to see who was inside, only a faint shadow. I stripped and stepped into the stall.
Squirting some shampoo into my hands, I lathered it onto my scalp. When I went to wash it out, I heard somebody open the bathroom door. I locked it though... Didn't I? Who could of gotten in?
Suddenly, a series of memories ran through my head to make one final conclusion. The new door knobs, mom being out. The conclusion...Derek.
But why would Derek do something like that? Why would the nice guy I know want to get me alone in a bathroom? Suddenly I heard the front door slam shut. "I'm home!" Mom slurred loudly. She must have been drinking again.
I heard her walking down the hall calling mine and Derek's names, then the rustling of coats as she hung hers up. The door opened as she walked in, stopping short as she saw Derek standing in front of the shower door, reaching for the handle.
"What are you doing Derek?" My mom questioned.
"Oh I am just getting ready to have a shower." Derek said scared.
"Um you do know my daughter is taking one right now." I heard her say back furiously. "You little perv, I can't believe you'd actually try and walk in when my daughter is taking a shower! You obviously heard the shower on." Then I yelled out, "I even told you when I yelled it down the hall." Then mom told Derek to get out if her house. And that's the last I have ever seen of him. Now my mom's out all day everyday smoking, drinking, and getting high. Like before Derek. I guess I will have to get mom a new boyfriend to keep her occupied, only this time lets hope he doesn't try to look at me when I am taking a shower!
After my shower I told my mom how Derek had been acting lately. She then said to me that he will never enter this apartment ever again. I was glad. At least that part of my life is fine. Now all I need is for the bullying to end, but it would take a miracle for that to happen. I just really hope that Marie won't turn her back on me like all my other friends did. All it too was that one rumour that went around the school. If you are wondering what it us, I will never tell. I'm too terrified something will happen that will destroy me even more.
When I went to school that morning everybody kept their eyes on me. Nobody moved when my friend Marie and I went by. I wondered to myself 'what happened this time? What rumor got started?' Now, as I look back on that, I realize that if that gets out at my new school I will probably kill myself.
That day at school, Marie came to me and said something that would probably change the way people looked at me. Somebody posted a picture of on Facebook. All I know is that they got a hold of one of my school year photos and photoshopped it. They made me look like I was drinking and smoking. "It's probably nothing. People won't believe that. You can tell it was photoshopped." That's what Marie told me. I believed her, until I walked into class.
I couldn't tell u how embarrassing it was. I sat down and looked around people were whispering and looking at each other their phones and iPods. That's when I finally decided to look at the picture. I took out my phone and and opened up the Facebook app. There it was. There were already 300 000 likes and everybody that I know saw it. Now it has gone to bullying to cyber bulling. Then I looked at who posted it. I couldn't believe who posted it. Marie. My best friend posted the most humiliating photo for everybody to see. I looked across the room to her and gave her the death glare. Everybody was giggling. The when I went to pick up my bag it got suck on the side of desk, and when I went to pick it up, and I fell. It went from giggling to laughing. I couldn't bear it any longer. I through a rage at my class. "DO YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY!!", I said in a loud voice. Then I called everybody a price of crap and I left the class. Now I know what I'm gonna do with my life. I'm going to commit suicide.
I got myself into the washroom without making a big production in the halls. I cried and cried and cried. Usually I ignore this kinda stuff. I'm brave when it comes to this, but I guess not anymore. I don't know if I should tell my mom or not. All I know is that I have no shoulder to cry on, and probably never will.
I was thinking to approach Marie at lunch, but since nobody is on my side, I was scared. I don't know what to do. That night when I went home, I asked my mom a question I asked her if she loved me. Her exact words were of course. But I don't know if she was meaning that sarcastically or not. Then she asked me why. I have never really heard my mom asking why before. I thought she didn't really care about my life. And then not being able to hold it in anymore, I started crying and I told my mom what was going on and how long it was going on for. When I was explaining about Marie, I remembered that I told her all my secrets, but I know that there not gonna stay secrets for very long. I showed my mom the picture and she told me that every thing will be fine and will be stopped. I knew that I could only believe that for so long. I'm lonely, and scared. My life is falling apart.
