Do you love fanfiction, fandom, and the all-consuming feels that come with them?
Do you ever find yourself wanting lots of fluff and adorableness from your favorite heroes and villains? *COUGH* boobcanan Barnes *COUGH*
Then you've come to the right...
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Talk dirty to me
Word Count: 346
Prompt: BEFORE YOU SMACK ME WITH THE HOLY BIBLE!!! It has nothing to do with the hanky panky (Sorry smut lovers) but there is going to be lots and I do mean LOTS of F bombs.
______________________________ In the distance you could hear the faint sound the Old Spice whistle blaring in your room from your phone. You knew exactly who is was.
New message from
Shit Biscuit 😍
"Hey sexy thang ;)"
"What do you want Wade?"
From Shit Biscuit 😍
"Oh wow Y/N. Call me Mr. Sexy. Asshole."
"Suck it up Buttercup."
From Shit Biscuit 😍
"Anyway, to answer your question. I'm in a really boring meeting. That the writer just HAD to put me into!!"
"Who?"
From Shit Biscuit 😍
"Never mind. Just... talk dirty to me ;)"
You rolled your eyes. You did NOT want to deal with this right now. Wait a tick. Let's just annoy the ever living hell out of him! Yes that will work quite nicely.
"Well... I'm not wearing any underwear ;)"
From Shit Biscuit 😍
"Go on..."
"Because you never fucking put the fucking laundry in the fucking dryer and washer like I ASKED YOU TO DO 100 FUCKING TIMES WADE WILSON!🖕🏻"
From Shit Biscuit 😍
"Holy hell, I can hear you yelling through the fucking text"
Your work was done. Put your phone on silent and went about your apartment with the normal chores as you kept hearing the faint distant sound of your phone blowing up like crazy.
"Aha I'm so getting it tonight." You laughed to yourself, surprisingly calm about the whole situation.
-Timey Wimey Skipply Boopy Thingy-
SLAM
Oh dear, and it begins.
You looked over the top of the couch and saw Wade who looked extremely agitated. Especially after he saw you just smiling innocently up at him.
"Hello Mr. Sexy, How can I help you?"
He set down his stuff and pointed at you with a stern finger.
"I hate you...I hate the writer more though. Bitch."
"Who the fuck are you talking about?" He always did this. It was extremely confusing.
"The-THE ASSHOLE WHO WRITES THESE AS SHE JUST CHOKES ON HER FUCKING COFFEE!!"
