Part 9

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Shelley- "Can I get you something to drink?" Michael- "No thank you. I really need to talk to you about something Shell. Please hear me out." Shelley sits down beside him. Shelley- "Ok, I'm listening." Michael reaches for her hand and gently caresses it. Shell's stomach was filled with a thousand butterflies by now she could hardly breath. Michael looks up at her he feels like his heart is about to explode, he's never been so nervous in his life. Michael- "I... I really like you, I mean I feel something for you that I can't really explain. Shell you make me feel things I haven't felt in a long time and ever since we met you've been constantly on my mind. I know I acted like an ass the last time we saw each other and I hate myself for it. I have a hard time trusting people but there's something about you that makes me believe you're trustworthy and special but I'm also afraid." Shelley's mouth is practically on the floor. She can't believe what she just heard. She thinks to herself. "This has got to be dream! If so I don't think I ever wanna wake up from it!" Michael waits for her response but nothing comes out. Michael- "I'm sorry I just thought I should let you know how I feel. I'll go now if you want." He starts to get up but Shell grabs his arm and pulls him back down. Shelley- "No please don't. I'm sorry I'm just... I didn't really expect to hear that coming from you cause I thought it was just me. I feel the same way Michael actually I feel a little more than that." Michael looks at her a little confused and anxious. Michael- "What more do you feel for me Shell?" Shelley hesitates for a moment but couldn't hold back any longer. "I'm in love with you Michael." Michael looks at her a little shocked but somehow feels happy. Then he starts to think about how she would feel after she finds out who he really was. Michael- "Well you shouldn't Shell. I mean your special in every way possible but me, I'm just a low level guy who's hurt people and done really bad things." Shelley puts her hand on his. Shelley- "You can't tell me how I'm supposed to feel. I know what I feel Michael and my heart feels for you." Michael is on the verge of tears. "I wish I could say the same Shell but I don't know if I'm ready." Shelley softly rubs his cheek with the back of her fingers. "It's ok you don't have to say it if your not ready yet. I'm just happy your here with me now." Michael cups her cheek and pulls her in for a soft yet deep kiss. They both feel like they're on cloud nine, it could be the end of the world and they wouldn't notice. After a minute in heaven they come back to earth and look in each others eyes. Michael- "There's something else you should know about me Shell." Shelley- "What is it baby?" Michael smiles at her. "I like it when you call me baby." Shelley pecks his lips. Shelley- "Anytime anywhere. Now what did you want to tell me?" Michael- "It's about my past. I'm not comfortable talking about it but I think it's best to tell you now than later." Shelley- "I'm right here with you I'm not going anywhere. It's ok you can tell me. Take your time." Michael inhales sharply and breathes out softly.

Michael starts to shake a little but stops when he feels Shell's hand caressing his. Michael- "Ever since I was little my father was the most abusive man I've ever known. He would drink till he passed out he constantly made fun of me he would even say, "You're not my son you look nothing like me." He would repeat the same words all the time and he wouldn't even let me call him dad, only his first name. He didn't even wanna be a dad and he was no dad to me. My mother said he always used to tell her to get an abortion when she was pregnant with me but she threatened to leave him if she did. So he stopped and she had me but guess where he was when she gave birth to me." Shell asks where and Michael says. "At a strip club." Shelley- "Oh my God and she knew?" Michael- "No he told her but of course he would always feed her this bullshit how she was the only girl for him and that his friends made him go. When I was 12 she found a condom in his pocket and lipstick on his collar. The worst part is I already knew he was cheating cause he was always going out when she worked the night shift. He hid it well from her cause he would get home before her. He threatened to kill me and my mom if I ever told her or anyone. I was terrified of him so I let fear take control. It killed me everyday not to say anything to my mother. She was going to leave him but she didn't, and of course things weren't really the same. She would avoid him from time to time and make him sleep on the couch for awhile. They would get into a lot of heated arguments I would try to block em out with my pillow. There were days I noticed bruises on her face" Shelley scoots a little closer and puts her arm around him. Shelley- "It's ok go on." Michael chokes up a bit. Michael- "I hated him so much he would beat me everyday mostly when my mother wasn't around, sometimes he would make me sleep outside especially during the winter but luckily he would forget to lock my window. I used to hide whenever he came home from work. My mother would try to stop him from hurting me, sometimes he would listen and stop and other times he would beat her too." He swallows hard and continues. "One morning when I was 14, he just up and left and never came back, no note, nothing. I was actually happy he left, sometimes I wished he was dead. My mother on the other hand was devastated. I could never understand why she kept him around for so long but she would always say there is good in him somewhere, she couldn't help but to hope that he would change but I guess he proved her wrong. I always admired her courage and dedication but I hated seeing her in pain. A year later after he left she was never the same again. She would try to be strong for me but she was showing signs of depression. She started drinking and doing drugs she even lost her job and started working at nightclubs. She would always blame me for his departure and one day she said something that killed me inside." A tear fell from the corner of his eye. "She... she said, "Your father was right I should've aborted your ass a long time ago! Then maybe he'd still be here!" Shelley's jaw instantly drops and her eyes are filled with tears. Michael was shaking at this point, tears were pouring out his eyes like a waterfall he felt like he was gonna break down any second. Shelley quickly wrapped her arms around him and pulled his head against her chest. Michael couldn't hold back no more every ounce of sorrow and pain he felt for so long was finally let out. Shelley couldn't hold back her tears any longer she was holding him so tight she didn't wanna let go of him, ever. Michael was sobbing hysterically his face was turning a deep red. Michael- *sobbing* "After she said that I ran away and never looked back! I never saw her again! I was in foster home after foster home but I didn't seem to fit in anywhere! I got a call one day they told me she died from drug overdose! I felt she was already dead before that! I didn't shed a single tear even after they gave me a letter from her to me and a picture of us in her possession and I haven't even read it yet cause I was already dead too! I've become my father! I'm a fucking coward! To this day I wonder if she'd still be alive if I stayed! I blame myself for her death she could've been saved if I stayed! She was my whole world! Aw God, Mom I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" He continues sobbing on Shell's chest and wraps his arms around her. Shell was shaking too at that point she couldn't imagine going through something like that. Her mother left when she was just a baby but her father was always there for her no matter what and loved her unconditionally till his last breath. She never once bothered to know about her mother. She was heartbroken when her father died but there was no comparing to what her Michael went through. "How could someone so beautiful, how could ANYONE go through that kind of pain?" She asked herself. While she was holding him she rubbed his back and gently rocked him back and forth.

After 10 minutes of holding and crying on each other. Shell soon felt Michael calming down and then she heard a steady breathing. She looked down, he fell asleep on her chest. Shell gently caresses his face and runs her fingers through his curly hair and whispers "Oh my sweet baby. I promise I'll never let you go. I'll be by your side no matter what. I love you so much with all my heart. Sweet dreams my love." She lays back on the couch still holding him to her chest, she kisses the top of his head and falls asleep. Michael opens his eyes, he looks up at her and whispers "I love you too Shelley." and falls back asleep. For the first time in a long time he felt alive. He also knew sooner or later he would have to tell her the truth about what happened after that.

To Be Continued...

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