The Empty Side of the Bed [SOONHOON] #Wattys2016

[2] T W O.

Remember to forget or Forget to remember?

   Soonyoung remembers the first time he saw Jihoon. He remembers the first time he met Jihoon. He remembers the first time he started developing a crush on Jihoon. He remembers the first time Jihoon asked him out on a date. He remembers the first time they held hands. Soonyoung remembers everything and he wished that he could forget them instead. All these sweet memories did nothing but to inflict more pain on his heartbroken soul and he wants to, he needs to, forget. But if Soonyoung wanted to forget it all so badly, then why was he at Jihoon's favourite cafe? Why was he wearing the hoodie that Jihoon loved seeing on him? Why did he order Jihoon's favourite coffee even if he knew he would't be able to drink it due to the strong bitter taste? Why was he still holding on if he wanted to let go?

   Without Jihoon, Soonyoung was lost. He was stuck between remembering and forgetting. No matter how clear he could remember all their memories together and every little detail of Jihoon, it still felt like he was forgetting everything. It confused Soonyoung to feel this way, he remembers everything but what exactly was he forgetting? So there he was, sitting alone, surrounded by so many physical memories of Jihoon. Soonyoung was lost, he wanted to forget but he was also struggling to remember. How did it feel to hold Jihoon's hand? How did it feel to be in Jihoon's arms? How did it feel to have Jihoon's love? Ultimately, Soonyoung felt empty - just like the other half of Jihoon's bed.

   Jihoon let his eyes shut for a few seconds as he caressed the bed sheets on the empty side of the bed. He lingered on the sweet yet painful memory of Soonyoung sound asleep right beside him, if this was how Jihoon could have Soonyoung then he would gladly be asleep for another hundred years or more. Opening his eyes to reality again, Jihoon's heart ached just like how his eyes stung due to the sudden brightness of his surroundings. All he could do to ease the pain was to catch a sniff of Soonyoung's cologne from the bed sheets and although the memories that flooded through his mind pained him to remember, he didn't mind. Alike Soonyoung, Jihoon struggled to remember but he would never want to forget all their memories together.

   It was only twenty minutes later that Jihoon found the strength to start his day. He sauntered over to his desk which was now perfectly neat and tidy - exactly how Jihoon wants it to be. But today, Jihoon couldn't stand how incredibly neat his desk was. He wanted his earphones to be missing from his desk because Soonyoung borrowed them and forgot to return them again. He wanted his laptop to be left uncharged with its battery flat because Soonyoung was using the laptop and got too lazy to plug in a charger when it ran out of battery. He wanted his pens to be left uncapped and his notebook to have a new page filled with scribbles because Soonyoung got bored and decided to leave doodles and cute messages for Jihoon. Instead, Jihoon had a pathetic, clean, white desk with his belongings in all the rights spaces of the desk and for once, he hated this arrangement.

   Jihoon stared at the white desk for a few more seconds before noticing something at the far corner of the desk. There, an ugly shade of brown stood out in the sleek white colour of the desk. A sad smile made its way onto Jihoon's face as he read Soonyoung's hand-written message for him. Lee Jihoon fighting!! I like you sooooo much, my ipdeok fairy!!

   Pushing back his emotions, Jihoon took his seat infront of the desk and picked up a pen. Pulling out the journal that he kept ever since he first met Soonyoung, he began writing his new entry. 25th June 2016 7a.m... I miss you Soonyoung. Deep down, he hoped that Soonyoung, too, still misses him very much but he wants him to move on.

   Back at the cafe, a waiter, who has been watching Soonyoung stare lifelessly at his cup of coffee, decided to approach him with a warm mug of hot chocolate. Chan was a new employee at the Cookies & Chill Cafe so unlike his colleagues, he didn't know the identity of this emotionless customer. He knew it wasn't his business to try to at least brighten up the stranger's day a little bit but he couldn't stand watching him do nothing but stare at coffee ever since he placed his order. Coming closer to the customer, he sensed a certain familiarity as he scanned his face. He was sure he has seen this face before but the problem was, where?

   "Your coffee must've gone cold by now." Chan spoke as he carefully slid the mug of hot chocolate infront of his customer.

   Soonyoung looked up, startled by the sudden interruption. He quickly rummaged his pockets for small change to pay for the hot chocolate and to give a tip to the considerate waiter but was stopped.

   Chan took off his Cookies & Chill apron and sat in the seat opposite of Sooyoung's. "It's on the house."

   "Oh... Thank you." Soonyoung replied. Little did Chan know, Soonyoung wasn't just grateful for the free drink but also for the interruption. His thoughts about Jihoon never stopped and Chan's interruption made him feel a huge weight fall off his chest as he was brought back into reality.

   Chan studied his customer once again. He was wearing a white hoodie with bananas imprinted on it, black ripped jeans and a striped headband. In the middle of the headband, a familiar logo was printed in the middle of it - a logo that Chan had in one of his shirts at home and a logo that Chan saw every Friday and Saturday. ROCK Dance Academy. So that was where Chan had seen this man before.

   "Ah... You go to the Dance Academy too?" Chan pointed to Sooyoung's headband before propping his elbows onto the table and leaning forward.

   Soonyoung shook his head and managed a small smile. "I don't attend lessons there but I teach the contemporary and hip hop classes."

   Impressed, Chan raised his eyebrows and applauded softly. "I used to assist one of the teachers in charge of the hip hop class! What was his name... Lee something... Lee Ji...Hoon?"

   Suddenly, it felt like the whole world was against Soonyoung as he heard the name he was trying to avoid. He couldn't blame Chan for this, he could only blame himself. Muttering an apology, he hurried out of the cafe before anyone could notice the tears running down his face. Chan, oblivious to his reasons, ran after Soonyoung.

   "Sorry, did I-" He stopped upon seeing Soonyoung crying to himself infront of the cafe. "Shit, are you okay?"

   Soonyoung wished that he was okay. He wished that he could be more than okay. He wished that him and Jihoon could be okay. Everything was far from okay and all he could do was shake his head as he let the tears fall. Where was Jihoon if he promised to never let Soonyoung cry alone? But Soonyoung wasn't alone and maybe the gods let Jihoon kept his promise afterall because as he cried silently, Chan engulfed him in a hug and started rubbing circles on his back.

   "I don't know what you went through but you're not alone, okay?" Soonyoung managed a small smile as he heard Chan whisper against his ear.

   Soonyoung buried his face in the crook of Chan's kneck, it was definitely weird considering the fact that they were still two complete strangers to each other but if it made Soonyoung feel a little better, neither of them cared.

*****Hellooooo. HAVE U GUYS SEEN THE AJU NICE TEASERS OHMAGAD IT'S JUN ERA IM CRYING.I CANT WAIT FOR THIS COMEBACK. I FEEL SO ATTACKED BUT IT'S OKAY. I GUESS I CAN RELATE TO THE PAIN OF MY CHARACTERS hahaha.Do vote for the story if u like this~ Love you alllll