Late night texting

four

*diana👆 on the morning *

I woke up next morning
feeling a lil bit dizzy bcz of the sun light shoting my eyes..

I sigh slightly bcz I'm not a morning person..

I walk towords the bathroom door ..after I enterd I looked at my reflection that was on that little mirror..
My face was not in his best state

I have got balck pockets under my eyes.. Which were so uglyy..

I moved down to my wrists to see alot of white cuts it turned into white bcz it's been so long since the last time I done cutting.. Each cut has a special story

I fought and I'm kinda still fighting depression but its less than before..

I went to alot of therapists ..
I stayed at rehab for more than eight months..

And I'm still haven't been 20
I'm only a 18 years old girl..
I'm only a teenager in this.. "ROUGH LIFE"

There were such so many reasons..
Bullying ,having the most awfal family.., but all these things weren't compared when I had my first love.. I was only 15

With my bestfriend which was a "GIRL"

Well.. We kinda of had a secret relationship which ended in being us as friends..
This thing ruined my life..

But going to the rehab has helped me alot of by forgetting her.. She is still my friend but I hate her so much now

She hurted me more than any human being heart can handle..

I was and still lonely as fuck
I only have austin by my side..
My dad is always busy he can't afford to me any moment to talk..he thinks I'm fine cause I have everything I need..
Money,car,perfect school,everythinh i want is always right here in front of me..
But money isn't everything
Money can bring anything but it can't bring satisfying.. Happeniess..love.. And the most of all .. A mother..

Maybe i haven't talked about this.. But it hurt the hell out of my heart to remember her.. she died and after one month I break up with my Girlfriend.. Everything was so bad.. I felt lonely so fucking lonely.. My dad tried to cheer me up eventhough he was so sad for mom's death but it didn't help my brother tried to.. Even her.. But instead she hurt me more..

So I got addicted to hurt myself to cut deeper n deeper into my pale skin..
Addicted to smoke weed.. crying all night not eating a thing for days and maybe weeks.. drinking as fuck ..

And it all had ened in the rehab when austin and my dad took me there because of my suicidal attempts I was so afraid..

But it all went in the right way..

Now it has been three years

I still feel so fucking lonely but I learned how to cheer my self by my own

Sometimes,I feel like cutting
But I try my best to prevent this thing to happen..
Cause I ain't the same girl anymore 'kinda'

oh gosh I've been staring at my self remembering all thoes miserable memories..

I washed my face and got out to see what to do in this kinda sunny day..ugh london's weather hasn't been my fave..

After I made me a cheese sandwish I tried to think what to do ..

When a familiar ringtone cought me of gourds

I looked down to see the ID caller and it was the boy with thoes emerald eyes calling..

What does he want at this early morning ?

I answered with the best tune of my voice

"Hey" I said clamly

"How r u " in a raspiy voice like he just got up

"Fine.. What did u call me this early ? I asked suspiciously

"I just feel calling you" I could feel him smirking

"Err.. What do u want harry go a head " I was serious

"I want to meet you,Diana"

_____

Heyy guysss 😍✋

Soooo slow updatee I know I'm so so sorry but I have been so busy af..

In this chapter as u see I mentioned some of diana's past..
Well I'm not so good at grammer forgive me if there are so mant mistakes flying around here..

Any question,I'm here to answer..

HAVE A GOOD DAY.❤

BYE✋😍