Savior

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I'm a girl. 18 to be exact. The year is 1830. My name's Hope. I'm currently being in forced to love Niall Horan, some guy in high authority. I mean don't get me wrong, he's charming and he's cute, but he's just not right. If he's forcing me to do something I don't want, then he's not all a "good guy". I assume he doesn't really love me and just wants me for my body. Every guy does. Apparently I'm perfect because I have curves. But what about my other features? Would they still want me if I had blue hair instead of brunette? What about red eyes instead of brown? But, anyways, my father says that by me marrying him, it will give our family a god title. We will prosper instead of just being poor peasants. We could get medicine for my mom, who  is severely sick. I don't want to be selfish, but am I? If I don't marry him, I'll save myself from him, but if I do then my family will have money. I'll have a meal per day, instead of once a week. I'll probably even get more than 1 meal per day. My mom will get the medicine she needs and will get better. My sister who's 6 will live a better childhood then I did. I'll get everything I ever wanted, but I don't want to marry him! Is that wrong? Maybe I should just give in. Maybe I should just let everybody else be happy instead of me. Lose my virginity to him, the only thing I have left that's mine. Me and my sister share everything. I have to share my room, my privacy with her. I have to share all my food with my family, and I don't want them to starve I mean, but I want some things to myself, but I have nothing. But, let's get back to the story of my life, shall we?

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