Scrap

#1

(pic: into the light)

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"Yoonjeong you came?"

I looked up and found Soonyoung walked inside. I grinned at him. He came across the room to my side, and threw his body on the couch beside me.

"You finished your schedule? Where are the others?" I asked.

He took one of my hands before answering, "Yea. They're still in dorm. We're gonna practice in like 20 minutes, but I heard you came. So I came here immediately."

I looked at Soonyoung. His eyes looked tired, but he smiled at me.

"But why you came? Is there something?" He asked, still playing with my fingers.

I thought for a while, what was that again?

Oh right. Earlier that night, I was on my way back from the lab. I was browsing through Twitter while waiting for bus, and I happened to found some previews from Seventeen's fan sign that held that night.

One of the previews is Soonyoung's. As always, his fans gave him a lot of weird hats and decorated glasses. I never understand why they did that. But lately I found it was rather quite fun to save those photos of him wearing the presents, just to tease Soonyoung when we meet.
And just like in any other events, Soonyoung would put a suitable expressions or acts to match with the concept the fans expected from him. But tonight, I felt something different .

"I was just looking through your fan sign previews..." I said my words slowly.

"And..?"

'And you looked so tired and so out of place and I worried so much I decided to run here..'

"..I miss you."

Hoshi, with his still very tired eyes, smiled wider than ever.

"What's with that sudden confession? All this time you've been rejecting me, I may get the wrong idea now."

I chuckled at those words.

"You may. But just for tonight. Tomorrow I'll back to the strict Ha Yoonjeong."

Soonyoung studied my face, and maybe he was wondering what my actual intention was.

"Don't think to much, Ssoon! I'm meeting you. That's all."

"Really?"

I nodded.

"Then let me sleep on your lap."

"Sure. Why not?"

Soonyoung looked at me in amaze, before leaning his head immediately to my lap. I could see him anticipating if I would change my mind on a second thought. I just watched him quietly and moved my position a bit to give him more space.

"아 좋다 이거"

I laughed at him. He smiled to me once more before closing his eyes.

"Let me sleep like this until the boys come.."
"Alright."

I leaned to the couch. My right hand patting Soonyoung's head and my left tangling with Soonyoung's hands. I watched his face in deep thought. There was so much questions going in my head, but I hold them.

"What are you thinking about?" Soonyoung asked. His voice sounded so distant, but he tried his hardest to ensured me that he was still there with me.

'Are you tired? It's tiring, right?'

"Nothing."

"Then why you're watching my face like that?"

'Are you happy?'

"I'm just appreciating the moment."

Well it's not a complete lie.

Soonyoung's lip was pulled to the side hearing my answer.

"I don't know you can be this greasy. I like it."

"Shut up and just sleep."

Soonyoung laughed and pulled my hand into his hug. "That's our Yoonjeong."

I sighed.

There was so much things I wanted to ask to you but I just couldn't.
How could I ask if you were ever tired, when you worked so hard to hide it?
How could I ask if you were happy, when I knew you tried so hard to keep your smile even in the most tiring day?
How could I ask if this all worth the struggle, when I knew so well it was your hard-earned dream?

"잘자 순영아. 오늘도 수고했어."