The Last Gunshot

4.

*Hi, I'm finally done! Hehe hope you enjoy it, whoever who is reading ;)*

I'm not sure how long I lay there for, my eyes closed, my brain trying to block out the world. It must have been for quite a while because Jack came up to tell me that the pizza was here.

He knocked on my door. "Nat, the pizza's here..." Opening the door slightly and glancing in, he saw me sprawled out on my bed.

"Uhh... I guess I'll leave you alone then," he shut the door lightly.

I rolled onto my back, opening my eyes to look up at my white ceiling covered in glow-in-the-dark stars and moons. Why there was more than one moon in one packet, I would never know.

I sighed loudly, closing my eyes again. I felt fresh tears flowing down the sides of my face, and squinted to get any excess tears out of my eyes. Only when the tears failed to stop flowing did I realise and acknowledge that I was crying. It was the first time since that day that I was actually crying, and it felt good to finally let out the emotions and tears that I had been holding back for days.

I heard creaking outside the door, but chose to ignore it, hoping Jack wouldn't try bother me again.

Tears continued streaming out from my closed eyes, and I didn't bother to try stop them. I knew they would eventually come out, with all the intense emotions I had been holding back for ages, but I had intended to hold them back for as long as possible.

I closed my eyes and let my mind wander freely. I saw Melissa in my mind, my best friend, the girl I had talked to about everything and anything, the girl I had planned to be my bridesmaid at my wedding (if I ever got married, that is) and basically my second half in life. To have her gone was like half of me had been ripped away without warning, leaving me empty and lost.

If I had stopped crying, it was pointless as I started tearing up again, reminiscing about all the times spent with Melissa and all the wonderful memories we shared.

Why did she have to go? Why did she decide to go, even though she had an amazing life here? Why did she leave me? I couldn't help but feel slightly selfish that she was leaving me, but I knew I wasn't the only one feeling her loss. There would also be her parents, her other relatives, her friends, especially Jack.

Right, Jack.

What's his intentions? Why is he choosing to be close to me, especially only after Melissa is gone... Does he have other intentions? Is he really just becoming close to me because of Melissa's absence?

Although I'm suspicious, there's not much I can do about it. If he's going to keep on following me like a pesky overprotective older brother, I guess I can learn to bear with it.

I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I didn't notice Jack had entered my room, again. He was looking at me all curled up on my bed, looking pathetic and emotional. I covered my face, not wanting him to see me cry.

Jack pushed himself closer to my bed, from the spinny-chair on wheels that everybody, regardless of age, loves playing on. He used one of his hands to gently stroke my cheek, and on the other hard through my messy and tangled hair.

"Uh... Jack? What are you doing?"

"Oh, shit, sorry Nathalie. Got a little, carried away."

I slowly - no actually, I move away from the side of the bed that Jack is on as fast as I can, keeping at least 1 metre of space between us. He seems to get the message and pushes himself, still seated on that chair, back towards my table in the room.