Why Cant I get A Break?(BoyxBoy)

Chap. 6:

**** PS: i realized i might have screwed up a name, my aplogies haha, Derek and Dean are the same person in here, sorry.***** (wow im way to late on that edit XD but im fixing it to Derek as I find the name.)

The next day, today was Saturday, the day of my date with Derek. and I was an emotional mess.

Last night came crashing back into my mind, and i turned to see Eric sleeping soundlessly next to me. He had red rims under his eyes, and my heart ached for his understanding. He took a while to get back to sleep and he wouldn't let me leave, so i had to bring him into my room.

I think he ended up hugging me until he fell asleep, but all i could do was listen to him whimper every once in a while in his sleep. He'd tightened his hug on me and finally relaxed when his unconscious mind knew i was here.

My eyes never grew tired but burned with tears that would not fall. All i had todo was listen to Eric's heavy breathing.

Now it was morning and i barely slept for 3 hours. I gently unwrapped Eric's arms from my waist and slid into my bathroom. I looked like an absolute mess.

I had the darkest rings ever under my eyes and i swear if i moved i could see ribs starting to peer through the skin. My breath came out shakily, just another reminder that i wont ever make it...

my body had taken a huge decrease in weight just recently and i noticed i couldnt eat much anymore. i looked unbelievably small without clothes on and with everyday that passed i could see a difference. today i knew i looked worse.  

I jumped when a panic knock came at the door. My hands fumbled with the lock and when i opened it Eric was standing there breathing like he just ran a mile.

His eyes were watering and as soon as he saw me i knew he thought I'd disappeared. I just opened my arms for him and he gladly squeezed the breath out of me. i didnt tell him that he was hurting me, his grip on me wasnt even that bad but it felt horrible.

I felt him shake a little and water drop against my bare back, "Eric, come on it was just a dream. Its okay-"

"But its not." he whispered, i could tell it was killing him, just to say a few words, "You- you will d- d- die soon and i- i cant do anything to stop it." his body trembled and hid his head on my shoulder.

I took a long slow breath and pulled him away, "Then believe im not dying. Just think im not."

"I cant do that!" he looked at me shocked.

"You can, just believe." i snapped. "It kills me to see you lke this Eric, Just for me, please."

His jaw set and i could see his answer, no.

i sighed and sat on the tub edge, "Fine, i need to get dressed."

Eric's eyes flashed and i knew he didnt want to leave but he had to. He nodded and silently slipped out of my room, careful to lock the door on his way out.

My shower was long, and while i took it my mind shifted to my father. He had said something to me, something about it happening to him too. What the hell did he mean?

I couldnt remember all of the conversation, except we were meeting for coffee today.

Knowing Eric, he was not going to be happy with this. He'd probably want to come with me, so i guess its up to my ninja skills.

Today my outfit consisted of a black v- neck shirt and black skinny jeans. My hair was with a black and purple beanie so it looked good with my eyes. I made sure the shirt ws long sleeve to hide my I.V. lines.

i wonder why i always had them in, why couldnt they just put them in when i got there?

I let it slide and quickly found my emergency pack. When i was ready i gently slipped the door open. I had a note ready saying what i was doing but not where i was going. But when i got down i was surprised to only see Derek downstairs.