Azumi's Story

Chapter One

As I stood there staring at my olive tanned skin, watching the heat evaporate off of my body, the heat circled rising from my skin. A single tear slid down my high cheek bones and fell onto my left breast. I hate it when I do this? It bothers me that I am weak, vulnerability is not a characteristic of a valuable woman. Every day I stand here, in front of my bathroom mirror and question myself. Continuously asking questions though I may never know the answer to. I don't understand why I do this but with all of the terrors I had seen in my short life, I primarily wondered, why am I here?

Shortly after mother died I begged my father to let us move, I just couldn't take living somewhere were the walls framed so many memories and captured so many good times with her. We even tried taking them down but that did work either. I t seemed she was embedded into the house. The house seemed to be a much dimmer place, the ceiling poured its mourningful tears with it rained, and the floor boards creaked as if screaming their sorrowful sadness to us. The very soil the house had been built on appeared to have been affected by the death as well.

After the funerals it had begun to rain a lot, I assumed mother was wrong Kami didn't take care of everything. He had left everything and everyone in shambles, our lives had become the epitome of emptiness. Her most prized possesion was destroyed as the rolling winds and waves of hurricanes washed everything out, her garden. It was completely destroyed, her hydrangeas that we used to pick together now covered in the mnerals from the fallen bricks, her white jasmine flowers were crushed by the salty smell of the fish market to had recently moved into town and now contain a dark shade of brown from the rushings of mud that slid down the streets during the crashing of the waves, and her favorites, her black tulips were torn and tattered after being used by the roaring storms.

It seemed that Kami was trying to wash away my mother and the other's existence from the world. It was hard watching the mob of broken families march in a single file line to the cementary, head hung low and face sketched with sad frowns. It was the probably the most devastating day in Japan history.

A load bang ripped thorugh the air bringing the memories to a rest. Turning my attention to the door, the bang was followed by another and another. 'Father,' I breathed after I realized the noise. I hurriedly gathered my belongings and headed toward my back room in a rush to avoid him. He's been a little on edge since I moved backin with him, he was recently released from rehab after a series of recidivism in the use of alcohol. Father became a heavy drinker after mother's death. I guess in a way for him to cope with her death, my grandmother always said father never handled situations as such in the best of ways.

"AZUMI!" Father yelled sending blistering to ripple through the long hallway. I quickly locked the bolts on my door, knowing how father can be when he's been drinking. Hearing him clumsily make his way toward my room, I hear glass shattering every few seconds as he tumbled through the darkness.

"Azumi, sweetie. Come out here to daddy," he slurred. I hear him fumbling with the doorknob, I cautiously walked toward the door.

"Honey, open the door," father gruffed.

"Father, are you okay?" I mumbled against the door.

When it took him a moment to answer, it frieghtened me.

"Come put papa to sleep."

I was debating on whether I should make him sleep on the couch or the floor. Then after a few seconds I heard him snore noisily against the foot of he door. I decided to let him sleep in his bed, where he should be. I yanked the door open angry at the pungent smell of his clothing. The smell of smoke, alcohol, and strippers saliva covered my father and washed of me, ruining the sweet smell of my strawberry scented body wash. I hosted my father on the side of me, pulling his arm around my neck, he leaned in and I smell the harsh fumes of Scotch fill my nostrils. I swore myself to never drink alcohol.

We clumsily trotted to his bedroom, careful not to accidentally add more bruising to his collection. Things kinda get crazy around here when my father goes on one of his drunken rampages. When I finally got to the bed I lightly tossed his heavy 6'1" frame onto it. I huffed in a few short breathes tired. Withdrew myself from the room before I could make an inspections of my father. It's always sad watching him deal with the loss of mother. I hate watching him struggle with it everyday.

I walked back toward the room and look out of my window, looking toward the sky at the bright full moon. It's brightness shined throughout the night sky, the stars had a small twinkle that seemed to make them smile. Tonight was the first good night I've had in the last long nine years of my life I thought as I laid down to go to sleep. Hoping for another one to come very soon. I felt into a peaceful slumber, thanking Kami for a blessed night.