i remembered when i stared at you, my mouth slightly hanging as you uttered those words to me.
did you really mean it?
why was i surprise?
"what?" i muttered in disbelief, i felt as if i was about to cry.
why was i not ready for this? i should have been. i knew this day would come; the day where you would finally give up on our relationship.
how stupid of me, to stay and fix this broken relationship,
thinking that maybe, just maybe, that you would realize that i was worth something.
but i was being to stupid.
i even knew wether you
were lying or not.
when you say i love you, i still acted as if those two words you would say were true.
i knew it wasn't.
i just wanted to feel loved.
i wanted to feel like i was someone who was worth it—someone who was important.
but i guess, we don't always get what we want.
i stared at the ground,
maybe dying isn't as painful as this.
i hesitantly nod my head in agreement, "yeah, let's break up." i said, voice cracking as i try to act strong.
"it's not you jisoo, it's me-"
"bullshit." i yelled and looked straight at you. my voice was shaking, "can you just leave... please?" i muttered and looked down again.
i didn't mean to shout,
i'm sorry.
you nodded and just left.
i knew you were
smiling when you left.
i closed my eyes, i was breathing heavily. why am i surprised? why do i feel like i want to cry when i knew this was bound to happen?
"why?"
i repeatedly asked, my voice closed tight as every words i would mutter that were bottled up inside me became pitchier.
I couldn't resist the pain i was feeling.
so i broke down.
i sank down on the floor as i sobbed and sobbed.
why am i so weak?
i couldn't stop crying. i tried to stop but the tears wouldn't stop flowing out of my eyes. i was breathing in and out.
i just sat helplessly on the floor, crying my heart out.
i didn't know what hurts more,
me dying or you leaving me.
baby,
i hope you're happy.
