Daggered Heart

Storytime

I ran into the bathroom my friend at my heels. When I went in i hid in a cubicle and sobbed. I cried and cried. Why me why did all the bad things have to happen to me. My friend Olivia hugged me close until I stopped crying. Then I sighed and started my story.

I was 12, so was she. We were happy little kids who had never experienced hurt before. We met eachother at the start of the school year and instantly clicked. We became best friends. We did everything together, we hung out at school and after school. We had other friends but it was mostly me and her. The happiness lasted around 2 terms. She started getting angry at me for no reason. If I chose to hang out with someone else one lunchtime she would freak out and start screaming at me. But the thing is she left me most lunchtimes with no explanation. She would ditch me, talk crap about me behind my back, and say really hurtful things. I won't repeat the things she said because that would take forever, but her words hurt. She made me feel ugly, insecure, stupid, worthless because she told me I was, and she convinced most of my class and friends to hate me. I had no one. We had one big fight and that was it. She always expected me to say sorry, and I did. I gave her the power. But after this fight I didn't and she begged me for a second chance but I had given her so many already I said no. Then she turned. She met up with other really popular horrible people and they picked on me and my new friends, I made three new friends and I was happy but whenever I saw her with me it made me feel sad. I missed her, but I didn't want her back. I saw what a horrible, self centred bitch she was. I had trust issues after that, I cried myself to sleep most nights. I heard the things they said about me and it really hurt. I faked my smile then broke down crying in my room each night. It's funny how the ones we love the most betray us like that. It scarred me, it hurt, I didn't know who to trust. I was a lonely, depressed girl in a cruel world full of cruel people.

After a while I stated cutting. I was so depressed that seemed to be the only way I could deal with it. I would cry, fake my smile and cut. I wore long sleeves to hide my scarred arms and I barely ever talked. I was depressed, I couldn't trust anyone in case they end up to be like her. I thought of new ways to kill myself each night but could never bring myself round to doing it. I guess you could say I was a coward, too scared to kill myself. I wondered around alone because everyone hated me and I barely ate or slept. I pushed away people, people who were close to me. I lost all my confidence. My arms were covered like a canvas, but my paintbrush was a knife, and the paint was my blood. Then one day I met a angel.

She saved me. She really did. Her name was Rose. She became my best friend but I had confidence this friendship would last, she was so talented, kind, funny, beautiful. She is the reason I am who I am today, she gets that I get upset and she helps me. I truly don't know where I would be without this one. I am now 5 years cutting clean. Because of her, my best friend. We now go to different collages but we still catch up every weekend and are as close as ever. She is my other half, my soul mate, my best friend. And I love and miss her sooooooo much!

When I finished my story I just sat there and cried. It felt good to let it out.

A/n hey guys!

This chapter is true to an extent, the part about the fight and the feeling like nothing did happen to me, but not the cutting or suicide, I made that part up  for the book. But I went through a hard time and I wanted to finally let it out. Thanks for reading this my other book lost is so close to 100 reads so could we please try and get it there! Anyway hope you guys are all right and if any of you need to talk or are going through a hard time message me because i will ways listen. Also I'm really sorry I suck at updating I just have a really busy life I'm trying to update more regularly. You guys don't know much about me unless your my friends from school haha so I'm going to tell you a bit about me.

1. I absolutely love dance. I am in a jazz troupe and we go to competitions and I just love it so much!

2. I love reading!!! 

3. My favourite songs right now are.....
- into you
- can't stop the feeling
- this is what you came for
- who says
- never forget you
- party in the USA
- rock bottom
- clap snap

4. I am obsessed with high school musical! Yes I'm a teenager ( not telling how old) but I love it so much OML!

5. I want to travel the world especially America, Paris, Hawaii.

Anyway have a great day everyone! Xxxxxx