CHAPTER 2

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He questioned me every time i never replied immediately to his texts or calls not knowing that on some of those days i had stayed up all night,working my ass off so i could earn just a little bit of cash to buy him gifts.He began to think that I was making him my second priority but that wasn't the case.I was a young teenage girl who was simply different from the rest of her peers.I worked for my own money and bought my own stuff because i hated explaining to my parents what i needed the money for.He was so scared of losing me but he just never knew how he could show it,i was his first love and he had never encountered anything like this in his entire life.I believe you could say we had both fallen in love with each other.He was so insecure that every time we had fights,he would run to my friends asking whether i had other relationships going on or something of the sort.This affected me because i would question myself on whether he still trusted me or not but he never found out about this cause i was never really the type to complain to him,i feared the thought of him getting mad and walking away from me cause that always seemed to be his only other option.

I feared the thought of being alone and not finding any one else who would make me feel the way i did while i was with him.I was so in love that I let some of my teachers,siblings and even relatives know about him despite knowing i had come from a black heritage.I was slowly changing for the good and the bad,being that i was willing to commit just to one person and have my attention based on them alone  not like before where a slight change in my partners behavior and i walk out, the negative part  being that i was slowly losing a part of myself.Where was the girl who could never allow herself to be mistreated,the girl who would not be afraid to speak out her mind,the girl who never believed in crying over the guys gone to?

I was slowly changing and so was he.Excuses of all sorts escalated from him every time he did something wrong,an apology for him was not an option and that's what pissed me off.I hated seeing my previous boyfriends every single day but any time Tyson cancelled plans with me I seemed to get so upset,not cause he had a valid reason but because he had simply chosen to go be with his friends rather than him being with me.You may say this was quite selfish of me wanting him all to myself,but all i simply wanted was my old boyfriend,the one who made me his first priority and got mad when anyone disrespected me.The new guy Tyson was turning into wasn't the same one i had fallen in love with before.

Despite me facing all these troubles i was still not willing to let go now because I knew for sure i wasn't perfect at all but the question was,'Was Tyson willing to fight and over come all these obstacles with me?Was he willing to put down his ego and apologize whenever necessary?' I'm guessing not because we had a silly argument that broke us up this time for good.This wasn't only a shock to me but to everyone else because we seemed to be so perfect together,we just completed each other and no matter how many times we broke up,people would still prophesy that we would get back and that's exactly what we did.We had at some point become inseparable and thought that it would forever remain that way  but at this specific moment it didn't seem so.We had been apart for over two months.For the first time in life i cried myself to sleep for a boy,for the first time in my life i felt like was useless,i rarely ate, slept cause all i did was ask myself what the fuck it is i did wrong,after all my effort and commitment is this what I get?


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