Background (Sequel to Desirous)

She's Out of Her Mind (Blink-182)

I was getting ready for bed when my phone rang from on the night stand. Bandit stretched lazily and swatted at my vibrating phone, watching me rush to grab it with half lidded eyes. What a nice life he must have, I thought darkly, just watching me run around like a lunatic.

"Hello?" I happily crowed into the phone, smiling widely at Andy's sweaty face that greeted me.

"Baby! Looking beautiful," He complimented, sounding out of breath. I could hear girls screaming in the background as he walked, looking like he was walking behind the stage.

"You make me blush," I joked, getting comfortable on the bed. Bandit swatted at my bare legs for pushing him over a bit, but the old fart could handle a few inches off his side of the bed. "How was your show?"

"Amazing! Las Vegas is such a great place, fuck. Oh shit, babe, Ashley is in love!" He gushed.

I had to snort at that, "Yeah right. Ashley the play boy? I thought you said he was in love with Kayla and that they were meant to have a wonderful, kinky life together."

He waved his hand as if brushing the idea out of existence, "Forget Kayla. This girl is amazing. Her name is Lexi, she's so tiny, but damn does she give Ashley a run for his money. He literally had to kidnap her just to talk to her. She fucking hates our band."

"What is it with you guys and kidnapping? What part of it being illegal does not comprehend in your barbaric minds?" I was exasperated.

"True love does not abide by the law," Andy giggled like a schoolgirl as he entered his tour bus. I glanced at the time, it was only ten o'clock. "They're on a date now so good luck to Ash."

"Yeah, good luck."

There was a lag in the conversation, Andy fiddling with something on the bus and I picked at Andy's boxers I was wearing to sleep in.

"Morgan," I braced myself, already feeling my eyes get wet. Just by the tone of his voice I knew what the next topic was going to be. "How are you?"

"Great! I've been going out with Alison every day, getting her clothes and stuff. She pretty much stays the night now that Jinxx is gone, not that I mind! Plus, Kyla-"

"Morgan," Andy shook his head and I fell quiet. "You know what I'm talking about. The ba-"

"This Lexi girl sounds really interesting. I hope her and Ashley get along, he's been alone for so long. I've known him what, three years? And no girlfriend?" I pondered.

Andy's face showed no emotion. I thought the video had frozen but then he blinked. He was angry. He was always angry.

"I'm going to bed, today was pretty long," He eventually said, lips tight. "Sleep good, babe."

"You too, love you." I offered in a small voice.

"Love you more." Were his finally words before he hung up.

I tossed my phone and slunk down in the bed, covering my face to keep my tears back. Andy only wanted to talk about it but I couldn't. I tried, fuck did I try, but it was so hard for me. I couldn't talk about it. I couldn't say the words. I couldn't look at Alison without wanting to kill myself. I lied saying that I spent my days with her when in reality I ignored her texts and calls. I couldn't bare to look at her pudgy tummy, growing with her baby.

I screamed and kicked out my legs, feeling like a toddler having a tantrum. Bandit screeched and ran out of the room. I curled onto my side, fetal position, and clutched at my sickingly flat stomach. Where was my baby? Why didn't my baby stay? I was already a failure as a mother and a wife.