I'm here inside the church,
I'm here, kneeling,
praying.....
~.~
It was six years ago when I choosed to serve God. I went to the convent, gave my service to God, to let Him know that am willing to be with Him forever.
But it was just one year then..
I was out in the convent for one reason,
I fell in love to a man.
Ramir is a man with heart, I find myself to him. I love him and i turn my back for being nun.
I believe that God will understand me with this decision.
I studied and graduated as certified public accountant for just four years, am now working in city bank.
~.~
Last week I received an invitation in our high school batch reunion. And that was the time I remember Ramir, almost five years I never had a story about him.
Yesterday I received a text message from Ramir and saying that we will meet here at the church, I'm glad that he remembered me.
I'm glad he had time to find my number to contact me. So excited.
Now wearing my favorite red sleeve, cream coat, black skirt and high heels.
I'm ready to face him and say what am really feels about him. I hope he never change feeling.
"Jessica..."
When I turn my back to the voice I heard, I know it's Ramir, wearing a
...sotana, welcome me.
"Hi Jess, how are you?" He shake my hand.
"Fa-ther Ra-mir.." shaken' voice as I mentioned his name as I stood up in the paw
"Long time, No see" as he seat
"Yeah..." As I sat beside him
"I thought we can't see each other"
"Ra-mir, I thought that we.... we... (I was shocked) I thought we can continue what we started before but I guess...." my tears slowly goes down to my cheeks
"From the start Jess, your in the convent and I don't have nothing to do with that"
"I'm out in the convent for almost five years and hoping to see you and to love you freely but your...."
"...I'm a father now, I'm serving God, for almost five years already, I was out in the city to service from other diosece. And because I also thought that we should continue our love by serving God and it's the best way to show our love when we have the same intention, but you're not a nun... more tears fall down ...Sorry Jessica for turning you down, I love God, and I'm here because I am destined to be with Him.I love you but I more love Him, and you're the one who made me realize that. Let's forget what happen before, you can now love other, they deserve your love. God will bless you always"
He stood up and I never see him back.
I was hurt, I doubt God's powerful grace, I don't believe Him that he could give me the best things for me.
But now,
I know, God understand my decision in leaving the convent and God have a better plan for me.
And I believe I never beat God
NO ONE
