Letters to You

Dear...

Dear Used to be Crush,

I was kind, I was understanding... I got in a rough patch because work started sucking ass. We talked less.. You had work during the week, and by the time I was off work on the weekends, you were half asleep.
Then one day... I needed a ride for work and you offered. I accepted. We both knew we liked each other again.. Both knew we wanted a connection.. You were a football player before the accident... We broke up because you were still new and hated the state and leaving the one you lived in for 15 years. I get it...
But we kissed and I thought something was going on between us.. Then you get mad at your stepmom and say you don't wanna talk... Then I message you the next morning trying to make you smile... You didn't... You gave me one word replies.
I asked my best friend what to do.. I wanted to ask you out. Make you mine again.. Make you happy... But I followed his advice. I wasn't gonna see you for a few weeks so I snapchated you... Asked you in a cute way. We're both in band so I had to ask...

"Will you be my dorky band geek?"

Your reply... "?"

Then nothing...
I told you nvm and I guess trying to be cute wasn't gonna work.. I was sad and upset. My best friend of 7 years then told me, "Tell him how you feel, tell him you aren't a toy! Express yourself."
So I did. I was so upset so I messaged you telling you how I felt... Little did I know you'd never reply... I grew angry that you started ignoring my texts, then just opening my snapchats... And completely ignoring me.. I told my friend we kissed... I told two of my friends... Then two more... We have mutual friends.
My guy best friend messaged you. Told you I cried myself to sleep for the rest of the week. I was a wreck, I made myself sick... I couldn't put up with the pain. I slowly stopped caring. Flirting with my guy best friend that's also my ex Panda... I spent hours with him driving around town. I kept talking bout you...
I kept talking bout you... Because I still care..
-Maddy