Chapter 1 Armin

122 4 0
                                    

(IK this is long but read it it's gonna get good
(My first fanfic so it's prob not the best but oh well)
Armins pov
I lay on my bed next to my notebook and pen staring at the ceiling, my mind full of thought.The air conditioning on full blast trying its best to cool the inside of my large home from the blazing,humid heat, of Florida. July was finally coming to a close, which only meant it was most definitely the hottest month of the year, with temperatures in the late 90s making it almost impossible step outside for more then 2 minutes before becoming drenched in a puddle of your own sweat. I personally despised both Florida and the ridiculous amount of heat. I personally am more fond of the cold and would much rather live somewhere up north like Michigan or Chicago. School is so close to beginning you can almost feel the tears of the adolescents dreading schools start. I personally have always loved school. Well at least maybe the learning part of school. Summer's before when I was very young, while kids were going on adventures and expanding there imaginations I sat studying and awaiting schools arrival. My Granpa would help me study in my free time. Nothing made me more happy than being thought pieces of information, absorbing it, and applying it. I would study night after night to excel in all my subjects. The harder the information got, the harder and longer I studied. Hour after hour, sometimes I would go without sleep and food just to make sure that the information was crammed in my brain and My test results showed all of my hard work. In elementary school I was always the top of my class "the child prodigy" and "genius Armin" are some of the few names that my teachers called me. I would always win awards for top test scores and over achievement, my teachers saw me as incredible and loved my hunger for knowledge. Like I said, I do love the learning part of school but for the other part, socializing I've never been very good at. Since the beginning I've always been a very shy child, I wasn't exactly a social butterfly nor was I one to gossip or talk. In Fact for most of my time in elementary school I was actually ignored by my class mates and I was okay with that. I know what your thinking, "how could someone be okay with being ignored?" Well it was simple, people and drama weren't around me to mess up my studies, and liked it that way. I enjoyed being invisible, it was way better than sticking out and gravitating towards all sorts of attention. I liked being alone. Oh of course I did get that occasional longing to want to have a friend to maybe play with and talk too, but it didn't bother me that much. Besides I felt more comfort in a good book that in a real person. But that all changed once middle school started,the kids started changing a lot. They grew a lot in places I didn't, there hormones started to go a little crazy, and they started to care less about studies and more about drugs,fights,and girls. As for me I didn't change like my peers did continued on with the way I always did things. I guess my above average grades and antisocial behavior is what led for me to become a target in the big hell of middle school because attention was attracted towards me, negative attention. It started out small, boys would start teasing me for my glasses and the clothing I wore. I was very sensitive back then, there words really did hurt me but ignored them and continued on. There insults gradually turned more frequent and frequent as time went on. The insults turned into shoves and trips in the hallways and the shoving turned into hitting until it was at the point where I would get beat up on a daily basis. It got to the point where I feared going to school, the only thing I ever liked. My grades started going from straight As to Bs and Cs, my attendance was to the point where if I missed another week of school I would've been in juvenile detention for Truancy. My life started to seem hopeless, I was always scared, I really just wanted to hide in my room all day. I felt the loneliest I've ever felt in my life. The beatings were harsh and almost unbearable and I had received them on a day to day basis, but what was the most painful was the words they would say.
Ugly
Fat
Worthless
Faggot
Those were the worst lashings I could've revived. And I started to hate school as well. It drove me into a deep depression. I started cutting a lot and almost ended my life.But finally school was about to end so I sucked it up and went and took my exams until the last day. But still I was very depressed and lonely. Shortly after my schools end my Granpa found out about my cutting and depression and decided to enroll me into a different school for the upcoming school year. I'm quite relived to not have to go back to that hell hole but in all honesty I'm not exactly happy or excited to start school like I used to be. In fact I could care less about my grades or about anything for that matter. I've grown emotionally numb to everything and nothing really makes me happy anymore especially not school. I was very pessimistic and it annoyed me to be honest. I wish I could change my attitude but I don't think any thing ever will. I don't think I'll ever be able to trust anyone. But I want too.This will be my first year of highschool. I want to be able to try something new now that I have a new opportunity at a new school where nobody knows me. I could be anyone I want to be. My Granpa opens my door shaking me out of my dreamland of thought. "Hi Armin I'm just checking in on you, how are you feeling, you've been looking sick lately are you okay." My Granpa says and sits on the end of my bed. "I'm fine" I say, sitting up, I don't want to burden my Granpa with all of my stupid teen problems, after all he's the one who single handingly took care of my whole life after my parents died when I was 7. "You know Armin, although things have been though for you lately that doesn't mean you can't change them, maybe you can turn the new school opportunity into a positive one" he say. I can turn this opportunity into a positive experience? No that's crap, nothing in my life ever turns out positive it's just better not to get my hopes up. "I understand" say to him. "You know what I would do when I was younger and had something to look forward too I would make a list of the thing I want to have accomplished within a certain time frame. Why don't you do that but For this particular list its what You want to accomplish before the end of high schools first semester." Hey say "So like a bucket list?" I reply. He chuckles "Well I guess if that's what the kids call it. Tell you what" he grabs the Ben and notebook next to me and places it in my hand. " List 3 things you want done before the end of this first semester of high school then try to accomplish your goals on the paper before the time frame is up" he hugs me then walks over to my door and opens it. " I love you Armin remember wether you make a good or a bad experience out of something the choice is up to you." He says than walks out of my room shutting the door. I look at the notebook and scribble on my my paper heading FIRST SEMESTER BUCKET LIST I smirk to my self, what a dumb idea. I pick up my pencil and scribble down
1. Bring my grades back up
2. Become a little more outgoing
3. Make the first friend Ive ever had
I scoff to myself. Make my first friend, as if that'll ever happen. I close my notebook and put my earbuds in and lay on my pillow drifting off into a silent sleep
( This is my first fanfic:) message me if you have questions or suggestions Comment telling me how you felt about the first chapter)

Your choiceWhere stories live. Discover now