Love, hate.
Hate, love.
That thing some shitty relationships lead to, right?
Miles and Alex were never compatible, and both weren't made for each other; but they'd rather lie to themselves and still "love" each other.
Alex trusted Miles.
Miles kind of trusted him.
Alex's trust was never enough for Miles, in any way. He'd still lie to him, he'd question every single thing Alex did and also would never believe a thing he said.
But at night, Miles loved Alex in every single way possible.
Every night they'd have a date in their bed.
A place just for their lust and "love".
At night, Miles would touch Alex's body as if he was a sculpture.
Alex would kiss Miles' lips in the most creative ways and play with his tongue in the sexiest ways.
Miles would pull Alex's long, brown curls; desperate for more of his love.
That love that dissapeared in the morning, right when the first ray of sunshine came through the window and shone in the sky. When it reflected on Alex's beautiful features, that's when Miles' would become himself again, and all the lust and love and affection; it'd be gone.
A month ago they decided to stop lying to themselves and Miles left Alex crying in his bedroom's floor.
Miles left, without knowing what he'd do. He yelled at his lovely boyfriend, saying that he didn't like him anymore and it was all his fault.
Between every insult, every argument, every broken plate that Alex threw at Miles they'd just kiss, heatedly and filled with hate. Their tongues fighted each other like a battle, a battle where no one would win.
Miles left Alex.
Alex filled a bath tub with cold water and jumped in, the lovely young man cried his heart and soul out to the rhythm of the saddest songs he could find. He pulled at his hair, he screamed, he cried.
His tears would mimic the soundwave of every guitar in every song.
Today Miles came back and knocked on Alex's door.
"Who's there?" The younger asked from inside.
"Miles." The older replied and sighed loudly.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Al asked, opening the door and facing his ex-boyfriend.
"I... I miss you."
"I thought you didn't care anymore, Miles. You said you didn't like me anymore." He said in response, running a hand through his long curls.
"I lied, okay? I lied, and i'm sorry. I can't express my feelings in the right way, but i love you. I do care about you. I care about you more than i care about myself.
I find you the most beautiful boy on earth, and you're just perfect. I miss you, i miss your skin, i miss your lips, i miss everything about you."
Before Miles sighed again, Alex pulled him closer and kissed him with lust and passion.
Alex didn't know what he wanted, and neither did Miles, but everything was pretty clear once their bodies fell on the same bed they've fallen before.
They were going to love each other again.
Alex sat above Miles' lap and took off his t-shirt quickly, then his lover's hands wandered all around his hips and stomach.
He leaned down once again to kiss Miles and take off his t-shirt while he unzipped his jeans as fast as he could.
Once all their clothes were gone, they started to love each other again with kisses in the neck, dirty talking, hands in special parts of their bodies, Alex's hair jumping around and sticking to his face because of the sweat, and him bouncing on Miles' member while he moaned and screamed; he was feeling alive again.
"M-missed -fuck- missed this." Miles moaned into Alex's ear and Alex groaned in response, tugging at his lover's hair while he took all of his cock inside, and the tip brushed against his prostate.
They loved every inch of each other, every inch of the skin that the sunlight never met.
Kissed every part of their bodies.
Digested each other; one kiss at a time.
Miles would say "I wish you were mine." and Alex would reply "I hope that you're mine."
We know very well how this ended.
The morning after Alex awoke all alone in his big bed, covered in white sheets and his clothes were threw all over the floor.
The man that he loved last night was gone.
He roamed around his apartment, trying to find Miles somewhere, but gave up. He wasn't there anymore; he left.
He left again.
Alex walked to get his phone and diall Miles' number, once he did, no one would answer the phone.
He left millions of messages, and still; no one.
Nothing.
Pure silence.
The following days were a nightmare for him, all the company he had was his anxiety, loneliness, glasses of wine, ciggies, a bath tub filled with cold water, tears, cups of coffee and phonecalls that wouldn't lead him to somewhere, something, or someone.
Friday.
The day he heard knocks on the door again and smiled as innocent as always.
Miles greeted him when he opened the door to let him in.
"Want something to drink, love?"
"Uh... Not really. I'm not staying."
Alex furrowed his eyebrows and complained about how Miles was always gone.
"I... I can't be here with you anymore. I don't like you, i never did. We've lied to each other the whole time. You can't love me, i can't love you. We're always fighting and i don't want to hurt you.
This can't be like this anymore, Alex. This has to stop.
I'm leaving this town, i don't want to hurt you anymore. All my memories are here and i want to be far away from everything that reminds me of you.
I need to get away from you."
Alex's jaw dropped and Miles walked to the door.
"Goodbye, Alex. I'm sorry."
Miles exited through the door and Alex was too shocked to go and make him stay, but still, if he tried to do that it wouldn't mean shit. His lover didn't love him anymore and his last words were probably the last thing he'll ever hear from him.
A tear rolled down his cheek and he fell, his body hitting the floor without anything stopping it. His body may be strong enough to handle it, but his heart seemed to be made of glass.
His heart broke into a million pieces and a million tears rolled down his cheeks.
Miles was gone.
He wouldn't come back.
Miles is leaving this town and there's nothing he can do.
Even if he wanted to try; he won't come back.
His fingers won't touch his skin ever again.
His words won't be heard ever again.
And after all Alex realized Miles was right, they couldn't love each other.
They weren't compatible.
They weren't made for each other.
His baby came home only to leave again.
