Scars

six

Holding hands, peeking glances, shy smiles and rosy cheeks; all became a norm after the days of Christmas. Hermione's heart swelled with the sight of Draco, his placid face breaking into a smile as he saw her coming. And Draco could too, smiled as he would see Hermione coming towards him with such enthusiasm, and it would make him even happier to see the necklace he gave her spinning, round and round and round with the steady beat of her heart. They felt better than they had ever since those dreadful years, and were finally able to accept the sorrows of their past and move on, onto a new beginning: one with them, a handful of words, peeking emotions and most of all, a happiness they craved ever since they set foot into the castle.

Hermione found herself anticipating the following days, she found herself regaining the control on her mind she thought she had lost forever. She no longer broke down into tears with the thought of her lost ones, however she did feel a strong pang in her chest, but it was no longer unbearable. She liked to think her friends were there, accomplishing more than what they had achieved. It made her cry, but smile as well. She thought more about the present these days; dread would not settle on her shoulders when the occasional letter came by, the nightmares decreased, she ate more than usual and she would not allow nostalgia to affect her.

It was difficult, but she managed it. She still hadn't recovered completely, but her progress astonished her. When she had first come, she hadn't moved from classroom to classroom without the frantic beating of her heart. she would snap at even the tiniest sounds, the dark had scared her and every moment she felt as if she was suffocating, that anytime the walls would collapse and bury her in her nightmares. Hermione's heart swelled at the thought of her progress, only one face coming to mind when she thought of it. One of blonde hair and a pale face, the face of an old foe that she never thought would mean so much to her as he did now.

He had suffered so much, being on the wrong side, making all of the wrong decisions and losing all his friends; his family broken to shreds. At least she still had her family, though they may not remember her, and so many of her friends still. Her heart broke for him. She wanted nothing more to shield him from the unfairness of the world, to rid him of his horrible mark. She wanted to help him as much as he had helped her.

He was her shoulder to cry on, he saved her, so many times from herself, from the memories, from the agony. His constant presence was all she needed to know she was not alone. She knew she had friends who were waiting for her, rooting for her. But being in sight, is different than being in mind. Seeing someone root for you, help you, is so much more than simply knowing they would. Harsh truth, but true nonetheless. It was much more powerful, much more impactful. Draco had given her just that, it was all that she had needed.

Though, since the past months he was not only in sight, but Draco had found his way into Hermione's mind as well. She found herself thinking of him as she wrote her essays; wondering what he would say if she showed him the silly topic. She went to sleep with his picture in mind, caught herself staring whenever he smiled. She would wait for morning to come so she could see him, make sure he was alright. She looked forward to their nightly stroll more than anything during the day. She loved being with him, and just the thought of him caused a smile to spread across her face, and she would find herself thinking of far off things, far off places, scenarios she knew would never come true, but she couldn't stop herself from imagining them.

•••

Draco too, felt things he hadn't before. After what seemed like centuries, he was able to sleep. He did not hear the dark lords laughter when he closed his eyes, did not hear the screams and the forbidden curses ringing in his ears. There was an emptiness, an emptiness he craved. He finally had the peace of his own mind.