Me? (A Nathan Sykes fanfic)

Chapter 16: this is not my day

Tasha's POV

I went in the spare room (and also sped when I came across Nath's room) and took off my clothes to take a nice LONG shower. The nice warm water was amazing as I ran my hands through my hair. I came out if the shower feeling refreshed as hell. I realized that Tom came in the room and left me some of my clothes on my bed. I changed into them and lay in my bed. My clothes smelt like him. The thought of him made me tear again. I hated the way he talked about him/her. It was his child and he talked about it like it was garbage. I went downstairs and found a penknife sitting on the table. I took it and brought it upstairs and I locked my self in the bathroom. I placed the cold blade against my skin as I slashed the word 'worthless' on my arm. Warm blood dripped down on the floor as I continued carelessly slashing my arm with long and short lines. I dropped and looked back at my arm. Shit. I didn't realize that I slashed his name on my arm. I trembled and started to cry really hard. I couldn't take it. The pain inside of me was torturing. I loved him and I-I thought he loved me too. With that thought, I deserved a couple more slashes. More blood came out of me till I decided to stop. I ran the water through my hands as I kept flinching at the pain. I finally came out of the toilet 15 minutes later. Luckily Tom brought me my long sleeved sweat shirt and i rolled down my sleeves. It hurt like hell but i didn't care. Nathan leaving was even more painful than my cuts. I went out of my room hoping to go to the clinic and get a pregnancy test. I came to the stairs when i saw all the boys in the living room. Jay saw me and i signaled towards the door and he nodded. I hid behind the wall as Jay tried to distract Nath.

"Hey Nath. Could you grab me a bottle? I'm feeling lucky today." Jay said. I heard a grunt and some footsteps. I stood up and ran down the stairs and sprinted towards the door. Looks like today was my lucky day because Nath didn't see me. I walked down the street till I saw a clinic. I bought a pregnancy test and my own penknife so I could return the other one. It might be one of the boys ones and didn't want them to know I was self-abusive. I walked back to the boys house and peeped through the window. I saw Max and Siva sitting in the living room and Tom in the kitchen. Nath and Jay was no where to be seen. I softly knocked on the door and the door opened to reveal a very depressed looking Max. A tear slid down his face as he looked at me. Shit. I forgot. Me and Alexis looked alike but we weren't twins.

"Alexis?" he said. I shook my head.

"Tasha." I said. He lowered his head and steeped out of my way. I ran up up the stairs and locked myself in the room. I went straight into the toilet and took the test and the results were positive. That deserved a lot a couple more cuts. This was never going to stop. I came out dried of the blood and rooled down my sleeves. That's when I heard a voice a used to love. Used to make me laugh and make my day.

"Hey guys. Where is my penknife? I need to open a box with my piano. Where is the box with my piano anyways?" Nath said.

"Um,err... i-its in the spare room but ill take it for you." Jay said. i panicked for awhile.

"Naw. I can handle it." SHIT! I panicked and grabbed anything that was mine and shoved it underneath the bed. I left the penknife on the bed so he could take that too. I slipped underneath the bed and heard the door open.

Close the door

turn the key

on everything that we could be

if loneliness would move out

i'd fill the vacancy

in your heart

in your heart

in your heart,ohh

in your heart

in your heart

in your heart

oh,oh,oh

A tear dripped down my face as I heard his drift away slowly. I peeped out from under my bed and brought up all my stuff from under the bed. I laid back down on bed and covered my face with a pillow. I hate my life.

Nathan's POV

I dragged my piano back to my room and placed carefully on the floor. We were suppose to be working on a new song so on this song, I decided to write it. I grabbed a penknife when I noticed blood on it. What the hell? Who used my penknife? I went downstairs and and saw the boys sitting around the living watching the football game. As much as I wanted to sit down and yell at the tv, I wanted to know why the hell was there blood on my penknife.

"Hey um guys, did anyone of you used my penknife?" they all shook their head.

"Then why is there blood on it?" the boys eyes widened as they listened.

"Mate, I swear to god. None of used your penknife." Max told me. I shook my head and went up to the spare room. Maybe I could find what caused it. I opened the door to find a girl sleeping in bed. Her face was covered by a pillow so I couldn't see who was it. I picked up the pillow to reveal a familiar face.

Tasha

I gasped but not loud enough to wake her up. Her face was tear-stained and her sleeve was red in colour. I lifted my eyebrows and carefully rolled up her sleeves slowly and was horrified. There were cuts and slashes all over her arm. including an engraving of the word 'worthless' on her arm. I turned her arm and a teardrop dripped down my face when I saw that she engraved my name onto her arm. She finched at my touch and I immediately rolled her sleeves back down and left the room. I closed the door and turned around to see the boys staring at me.

"We can explain. When you left her alone on the beach that night, she told us to go home and she'll meet us here. But instead of doing that, she ran off somewhere and spent the night there. Then we found her knocking at the door the next day. She was filthy and pale. She said that she was at that wrong house but i think she actually finding a place to crash and accidentally came here. We let here stay at the spare room until we could we could find her a proper apartment without you finding out because we thought you would flip out knowing she was here." Tom explained. It was too much for me to take in. I lifted the penknife towards the boys.

"I found was there blood. Her...arm...cut...my...name..." I immediately broke down. I-I couldn't help it. I was so hard her about being pregnant. I was actually worried for her. The fans. Management. I was afraid she couldn't handle that much hate. I pulled myself together, pushed through the boys and ran towards my room. We really needed to talk.

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Hope u guys like this chapter. my heart was really heavy when i wrote this. please share/comment/vote. thank you:)

~A