Stuck in Time

not again and confessions

Michael pov

I looked down at my wrist that was now covered in blood from what i just did. I know that me and Rayne promised but here both of us sat in the bathroom really early the next morning; sliting angry slashes into our wrists with a sharp tipped razor. We both woke up from a nightmare of what mother did to us and feeling sorry for ourselves we climbed out of our cribs and crawled into the bathroom. Our mothers words and evil face still fresh in our minds from the terrible dream. Not like it ever left in the first place, curse our stupid photographic memory. Why must we have it. It would be better if we at least had a good past or good things to remember but the only good things i remember are the frequent days Rayne and i snuck out to the beach behind our house that was falling apart and we laid on the shore starring longingly at the kids that played freely and the calming water that melted the pain. Other then that the only memories were of pain and here drunk face. The pounding of her footsteps that she took as she walked away after she beat the heck out of us. It was 22 exactly. 22 footsteps and she was gone to get more drunk out at a random pub. Thats all we could remember that and the horrible smell of the alcohol that was always on her breath. All bad memories and the memories lead to evil and painful dreams.

Rayne and i cut so much that the pain didnt even bother us anymore all it did was help to lift us from the bad dreams. As we watched the blood drip down our arms, we heard a gasp. Looking up i saw daddy and niall. Looking at them with terror we started to back away thinking that they would hurt us for disobeying them. Rayne and i held each other tight both needing comfort of the other.

"oh babes we wont hurt you. But i believe i asked you to stop doing this to yourselves, my loves" daddy said with lovs and hurt in his eyes.

"the nightmares Daddy!" We both signed. He looked at us sadly.

"oh my loves. Its gonna be ok. If you have a nightmare come get us. Lets forget about your past and we can move on. Im sure youll be much happier?" He told us. I gave Rayne a look and she returned it. We would have to tell them.

"we can't" i signed to him.

"and why not baby?" He asked.

"we have a photographic memory" we signed in unsion and sighed afterwards. He pulled us into his arms and just held us close.

"itll be ok. Lets get you two cleaned up and then well go back to sleep for a little while ok. Daddys gonna let you two sleep in his bed" he told us. We nodded.

"baba?" Rayne signed.

"dummy?" I signed.

"blankie?" We signed in unison. He smiled at us and nodded before picking us up and setting us on the bathroom counter. Niall cleaned up Rayne , while daddy cleaned up me. After Daddy changed our nappies and niall went to get our babas. finally having everything we climbed into daddys bed and drifted off to sleep drinking our baba, while daddy sung you found me to us. I remember my dummy being out in place for my baba and passed out snuggled into my twin sister and my new daddy.

A few hours later we were woken up by uncle hazza and loulou running around the house laughing. They ran into the room and i lazily signed to them to be quiet before rolling over and putting my arms around my sister.

"wake up. Wake up. Wake up in the morning!" Lou and hazza started.

"dont even start harold and louis. Ill be up in a minute but leave the twins alone, they need more sleep." Daddy told them sternly. Letting him take care of it i drifted back off into the land of dark and nothingness.

Not to long after we were awoken to daddy shaking us lightly.

"come on my loves, you gotta get up now" he said gentile. Nodding i pulled away from Rayne reluctantly and raised my arms at daddy for him to pick me up. He chuckled at me but lifted me into his arms and did the same to Rayne before he took us to our room. He changed Raynes nappy and then mine and left us in just our nappies before taking us downstairs for breakfast. Pancakes and bacon awaited at our seats, sadly without syrup this time. He set us down and everyone ate before daddy announced that we could go to the park down the street. Yea i thought to myself. I quickly ate and tried to hop down from my seat before remembering that it was buckled and i tried to undo them but it was on child lock. I groaned annoyingly and whined to get someone attention. Harry looked up at me and saw me struggling with the buckles. He shook his head no at me.

"in a minute lad. Drink your milk. We will go to the park in a bit" he told me. Nodding i drank my cup wanting to hurry up and go to the park. I wanna play and run.