Esil
The Day Before School Starts
School starts very very soon. I don't want to start school. I am not ready, what if I can't make new friends, what if all my teachers hate me, and what if I can't find my classes. The school is so big with 3,000 people. St. Joan de Arc High School, a school for athletics. My friends and I have a joke about that
You come to St. Joan for the arts program and the academics.
No one does, it's all for the sports everyone who goes there plays sports. Sports sports sports. What if I am not good enough to make the Lacrosse team? I would never be able to live that down if everyone from my travel and rec team made it and I didn't. The pressure is going to kill me.
Mother told me to pack my things tonight and to pull out my clothes for school tomorrow. I have my navy blue Jan Sport, and my computer is charging, I have pencils and pens, my calculator, the folders they recommended, and my head phones. All I have to do now is pull out my clothes. My polo shirt is hanging in my closet along with my plaid skirt. Uhg my uniform is awful. My skirt is so long to everyone's is going to be short and I am just going to stand out even more. This is so unfair, I hate this why can't I hem my skirt like everyone else? Mother says it's not ladylike to have a skirt short like that especially for school. What if I don't want to be ladylike?
Sometimes I hate my mother, she just says things that she thinks wouldn't hurt me but they do. Other times she is so nice and kind and does little things for me like making my favorite dinner without me asking. I love her so very much but at times she can be hurtful. Now that I think about it and see it on paper I really do love her and am thankful. I feel like I am just contradicting myself...
Esil
3 hours before I have to get up for school
I can't sleep. This is not good. I have to sleep. It's 3 o'clock in the morning, I need to fall asleep. If I lay here for long enough I will fall asleep.
Esil
5:32 am
Ok, we can do this. Just get up and straighten your hair yea you can do that. Brush and straighten your hair. I can do this definitely.
Ow! Ow ow ow ow ow! NO no no! I can't believe I just burnt my ear how could I have not been paying attention? This is an omen, I can't go to school today no I can't. But I have to it's the first day. I am going to school and I am going to finish my hair.
~~~
Ok, my makeup is done, my hair is straightened, skirt rolled, and shoes on. All I have to do now is get in the car and drive myself there.
Esil and her Mother
On the way to school
"Esil aren't you excited! It's your first day you get to see your friends and meet new people!" Spewed her Mother.
"Yes I can't wait to see them." She was lying through her teeth. She hated lying to her mother but sometimes you have to lie.
"Fix your hair darling we are almost there."
"Wh-what's wrong with it?" Esil spent an hour on it today why did Mother have to be like that?
"Oh well it's just a little trashy. Don't you think?"
Esil had her hair pushed back in a headband that her mother had bought for her months earlier.
"Yes ma'am" She said as she got out of the car almost eager to get to school.
As soon as Esil stepped foot out of her mother's car she could feel the heavy air the surrounded her. As she walked through the halls Esil felt vulnerable against hard tile floors amongst the upper class men. She saw a close friend of hers and almost ran to him. She couldn't have been more relieved. After she got close enough to talk to him before he said anything he gave her a hug and looked at her in the eyes and said,
"We can do this."
That is the only "we" Esil liked to hear. Esil smiled and nodded her head.
"I like your hair it looks good today." He said with a smile. Together they walked down the long crowded hall to their first class and took the two seats farthest in the back. Esil let out a sigh of relief and she knew that it couldn't be to bad with him around.
