Pressured Love

I get it I get it

*Miracle*

"toine are you home " I yelled as I walked in . I heard two voices in his bedroom . I went in the kitchen and grabbed a frozen pizza and turned the oven  on . I took off my black hoodie. I had on my victoria secrets bra on and that's it .

"oh hey miracle " toine said coming out the bedroom shirtless.

"Hmmm. hey " i said with my eyes glued on my iPhone.

"Ohhh .. ant im leaving ill talk to you later " the little female said  not making eye  contact with me .

"look  can explain miracle  " antoine said walking towards me . I laughed  ...

" why you got to explain ? im not yo bitch " I said getting up putting the pizza  in the oven. 

"I aint do no thing with her... " he said being honest . I walked past him and looked in his bed room. the bed was made. the game was on and pop cans on the floor.

"she just my bestfriend.. since i was ten years old. " he said walking up behind me

" im not tripping  babe.. i believe you " i said putting  my arms around his neck. He picked me up and walked us to the kitchen.

" so u wouldnt believe what... boss made us do today " i said sitting on his lap.

"what " he said looking in my iPhone.

"we had to kill tgia new kingpin ..Umm his name is marvin ... "

" hold up ? Marvin with the dreads and he dark ?" he said sounding concerned

"yeahh "

" that bitch killed my brother " he said getting angry.

"well my friend shay did they dirty work... that was her baby daddy  "

"damnn that's fucked up "  he said playing in his dreads. He stopped and looked at me." what " i said looking at him .

"why yo lipstick almost  gone " he asked .  Damn... nick did kiss me .

" boyyy u better gone " i said kissing him  on the lips.

He held my waist tight and kissed me slowly. ...

" don't start nothing you can't finish" I got up and took the pizza out .

i cut it and we ate...

" miracle ... i aint gone lie ... ima hoe ,... but i dont want to be a hoe .... i want to make you mines " antoine said as we ate at the table .He caught me off guard i almost choked.

"what are you saying " i said looking at him.

"i wanna be with you " he said getting up and grabbing my hand.

"why me ? do you know how many niggas gave me that bullshit ass line .... yall niggas dont understand how much a bitch could take . Look i ain't  gone lie .. i fell for that line everytime ... what makes you different ?? you think you can just ask me to be with you and im fall for it ? uh no ! fuck that shit ... i been hury back to back ... cause you stupid boys these days dont know what yall doing " i snapped. ... i don't know where it came from but i snapped, Antoine stood there in shock.

" listen to what you just said ... boys ? i ain't no lil boy im. a grown ass man . i Dont play games. i got my heart broken too .. because i love to hard . you ain't the only one hurting. stopp comparing me to the last nigga that did u dirty ... " he said coming close to me .

he grabbed my waist  ... we were eye to eye ...

" promise me you won't hurt me " i said grabbing his face.

" promises are made to be broken .... i put that on my life ... i will never hurt you ... i seen scars on your body from abuse, fights , love.. I don't want to do that ... I want to heal you... i want to love you like how then other niggas aint  do . But if we together ... you gotta trust me " he said looking me dead in the eyes .

*Shay *

I drove to a empty parking lot and cried . I feel like shit ... i killed my son father ... i fucked my bestfriend nigga, i fucked her last nigga for some money . what is wrong with me . i cried until i couldn't cry anymore... i fixed my face and looked at my phone my bestfriend Randall Texted me . I told  him i was on my way to his house . Im glad he out of jail ... we had alot of catching up to do.

He went and had a baby on me, he his so cute... his name is Noah.

" hey bff " i greeted him with a hug. We haven't seen each other since Foreman Days .

" hey shay how u been man.. where my god son ?" he asked flopping on the couch.

"good good .. trying to hold it up .. he out .. i got to go get him " . We talked and talk for about 3 hours. 

"ight bff i gotta get going ..ill stopp by a lil later " i said walking to the door. 

"ight Come by tmma.. tae will b over here " .

He hugged me really tight ... Then we made eye contact then he kissed me dead in the mouth.

" now you know we cant do that " i said looking at him .

"im sorry " he said  smiling