Torn Apart

Aged 18

November 26, 2012

Year 12 is a bitch. Last year of high school and I feel completely drained.

I still don't have many girl friends. Sometimes it gets annoying. I mean every girl needs at least one close friend to talk to. I can't exactly tell Danny and Nate everything, there are some things you can only tell a girl.

Danny and Nate are great though.

People have been asking Danny if he is worried about Nate because we are so close, but he replies with; "I trust Mel and Nate. They are just friends nothing more. I knew how close they were before Mel and I got together."

Danny and I have been together for two years now.

It feels great to have been able to prove people wrong, though now they are saying we wont last past high school.

Maybe they are right, but it will or wont happen on its own. I am not going to dwell on it. I love Danny and if life outside of high school, where we see each other every day, gets in the way then so be it. But it wont be because everyone around us have doubts.

Exams are draining me. Nate and I are most of the same classes but I still can't handle it. I feel like I am taking one step forward and two step back mentally.

I am happy. To an extent.

I am proud that I have made it this far in school, and I plan on going to uni, and I love my friends. Yes granted they are all guys but I was never really a girly girl. I don't like playing sport but I will watch it. I will go see the action movies. I am happy being one of the guys.

Danny is great too. Always makes me smile when I am feeling down. Even when I don't realise I am down.

He even makes me eat too.

I got a part time job this year and between work and studying for exams I forget to eat a lot. At school he makes sure I eat before he lets me study.

He is so sweet I some times feel like I don't deserve him.

I've had boyfriends before they have been more of the friends who are boys. Danny is my first serious relationship.

I thought I was done with Andrew.

I thought I would never see or hear from him again.

Until just before my 18th birthday.

He sent me a birthday card. Which okay yeah it was nice of him. But it also contained a wedding invitation to his and Sophia's wedding.

Who would do that on their daughters 18th birthday?
Send the invitation a week before or after not with the birthday card.

He has called on my birthday in previous years but dad and mum answer it.

He always has to ruin my good mood.

But on the plus side, I have found a few courses for music that don't have any prerequisites for high school music subjects. I am still applying for Graphic Design courses but Music is what I really want to do.

Hopefully once I leave school and start uni, I can leave all this drama behind me.

Finally be happy.