Just Like Yesterday

3

But I'm not dead.

I'm lying on the ground, the air encasing me like a warm cocoon. My ears ring at first, but once they clear all I can hear is a roaring sound, much like the ocean. It gets louder and louder, and then I can hear people screaming. Shadows hover above me, voices bark. There's flashing and someone has me by the arm. His grip is firm, steady, and sure. I can see the shadow of his head bent in front of me. He yells something over the rest of the sound. I can't tell what he's saying. He says it again and again. One syllable. His tone more urgent each time. There's four heads above me, and they're all yelling words that mix together with the screams and the ocean and the lights and the warm cocoon of suffocating air. It's a stew of confusion and I'm groggy yet terrified, and for a brief moment I wonder if I'm in hell. 

My eyes focus on the faces above me, but I don't recognize any of them. There's a dark wall behind my head where I lay, and my feet are at another wall. A man above me asks me if I'm okay, and I understand him this time. 

"Yeah."

I don't will the words to come out, but they do. I can't hear myself over the roaring noise. It's too loud to be an ocean. So many people are yelling, I can't hear my own thoughts. The man is offering me his hand and pulling me off the ground. 

My legs feel uneven and my stomach churns. My mind is still foggy. The edges of my vision darken and I expect to throw up, but I don't. The man still has a firm grip on my arm. He asks again if I'm okay, and I nod. He asks if I think I can still go on with the show. I don't know what he means, but I nod again. Why do I nod? I'm not okay, and all I want to do is lay down in the dark cocoon again. But the man is hoisting me upwards onto the wall that was laying next to just a moment before. The roaring grows louder. I'm on my feet above the man and on top of the wall which has become the floor. 

Theres an x on the ground in front of me made out of masking tape. I blink until my eyesight isn't blurry anymore and look up. A shadow approaches me, silhouetted by a giant, white, pixelated screen. Another man. 

"Hey, you okay?"

I nod as his face comes into focus, a square jaw and worried eyes. His hand is on my arm. I lean against it, suddenly becoming queasy. I recognize this face. Again, words come out of my mouth without me willing them to.

"Josh Dun?"