I soon returned back to school and had fear something would happen again--, this school year was not turning out well at all. I have no body to talk to now that she's gone. I feel invisibly scared. About my old friends, Tasha , Logan , Paul and Angie. They've disappeared and probably forgotten about me. I would say this is okay and that they'd come back but it's been a huge amount of time since they've checked up on me.
My mom doesn't talk to me and my dad died, he died but not in honors. I liked our little family though, I can't even come out to my mom, who knows what she'll do to me. No she won't say anything like "you're grounded for a year!" Or "you're only being vegan for the rest of your life!" But more like "move out I hate you, you're a disappointment! An embarrassment and mistake! I don't want to be known as your mother." And I can't take pain like that not after everything I've gone through.
I see a lot of people looking at me when I go back to school, day after wretched day laughing at mysteriously
chuckling. I'm not surprised if they found out. "Hey Zane" a familiar voice came korrina! I try to act like I didn't notice but she kept calling knowing that I heard her. I have gone through anxiety and suicidal thoughts as well recently and teasing and basically anything could lead to suicide for me. My favourite thing to do has become harming myself and thinking about haunting thoughts. My dog, who I haven't talked about is very sick, her name is Jourdan. So she couldn't come to visit. Suddenly,
A thought came to me. I can't be alone. I have to be strong, when I came home I called for my mom. "Mom!" I yell "Sweet baby Jesus Zane Daniel Hunter you don't have to yell. gosh" yea, my moms a bit of a drama queen. "What do you want, Zane?" She politely kind of says "mom , that very day I collapsed , I was trying to tell you that Serena died. That friend I kept visiting at the hospital, I was trying to explain everything and now that I've kept it to myself it let me to self harm and anxiety. I've made no friends , I've been bullied , abused , knocked out and nearly died. I can't do this anymore, please just don't turn on me." I begged her
she smiled and closed her eyes "Zane" she said sounding firm I look at her afraid of her answer "are you gay?" I stepped back in shock spilling and knocking down the coffee and cup I shook my head "mom" "mom please" she started shaking and crying as well as whispering to herself she opened her eyes and she could only see blurs of what she has created and suddenly fell down
DELINAS POV (zane's mom)
I open my eyes, my son is sitting on a chair beside me in his room. He has fallen asleep I believe gosh darnit Zane. You're asleep. I tuck him into bed but don't kiss him. He's gay. I hate him. I know he's my son I've been raising him for 13 years and this is what he's become. I couldn't be more disappointed , how could my son be gay? But he said that he's been going through a lot of pain no matter what he is I can't leave him like this. I walk downstairs and remember the teacup that he knocked over it was just slightly chipped luckily. He left a note saying "I love you mom, I hope you'll be able to accept me some day. But since right now you can't. I've decided to run away. Somewhere I can. Be supported . I'm sorry but I need someone to understand.
Delina Rose Hunter, I truly love you.
-Zane"
no way he left. I just tucked him in. Ah , he probably forgot. I go back up into his room but he's gone. The window is open the thrusting cold wind leaves me heart broken. no no this must be a mistake! I run around the streets asking if anybody saw him. "Around 6'3 seventh grader tan skin black hair beautiful brown eyes and male also gay if that helps" I go around searching adoption centers and go to a lake to stop. "Huh?" I see a slim and tall black shadow standing near the edge of the bridge "it's 3am I must be seeing things" I walk closer, the shadow looks nervous and like its about to go into the water. I walk up to it "hey um--" they turn around. It's Zane. "I've been looking for places to stay but i realized this world is better if I'm gone." Zane doesn't know how to swim! What is he doing?! This... This is where Jacob died! I can't let Zane die! I jump into the water and with my very old lady reflexes I can still swim. I bring him up and drag him home. But when I come home, I see a human heart on the floor.
