I Follow Her

Guard Your Heart

He stared intently at my face. I could've sworn I could feel heat from his stare. He looked down at the sketch pad then back up to my face. My eyes darted every time he looked my way. It was too quiet.

"This isn't being graded Mr. Morrissey." I joked.

A scoff was his only response. Really concentrating now, he furrowed his brow. I took that time to study his face as well. He wasn't wearing his glasses today so his bright blue eyes were on full display. His face was showing that it had been a few hours since he had a shave. His hands gave way to his long slim fingers which clung to the pad and pencil. The focus on his face was an endearing expression. One that I, so far, had not seen yet. Seeing him do something with such care and intent was incredibly attractive, which is fairly odd.

"So you're an artist who can't really cook...would one say you're a starving artist?" He spoke finally.

"Okay you can leave." I snapped back at his terrible joke.

He breathed a laugh from his nose and kept sketching.

"When's this masterpiece going to be done?" I whinged.

"When it's completed, then it will be done...How'd you get that scar by your eye?"

My hand went to the tiny nick by the front of my eyebrow, I forget that it's there. "Boringly. It's from having chicken pox. I scratched my face and it left a scar."

"Hm...that is quite boring."

"Thanks." I sighed. I crawled closer to Steven on the couch to try and peek at the drawing. "Let me just...have a look."

He pulled the pad against his chest, "I've not finished. You can't rush perfection!" He laughed.

"Well I was born in just an hour...I think you're wrong there."

"Jesus." He chuckled.

"Lily. Nice to meet you. Come on! Show me!" I pulled at his arm.

"Oh wait just a minute!" He tried to keep drawing but I protested and pulled on his shoulder.

He slid onto his back causing me to fall on top of him. His face now quite close to mine. I held my breath. He dropped the sketch pad to the floor and continued to stare at me. I should have gotten up but I was frozen. My body moved slightly up and down with every breath he took. It felt like an incredibly long time but was just a moment. He leaned his head even closer to me and we kissed. He raised his hand from his side to my waist. I pulled my head back quickly, shocked. He smiled. I leaned in and kissed him this time. His mouth started to travel down the side of my face then onto my neck. I breathed a bit heavier now. Steven grabbed more onto my waist as his face was nuzzled into my neck.

"Wait." I breathed the words in almost a whisper. He didn't seem to hear. I spoke up, "Hey. Wait."

He lifted his head and met my eyes, "What's wrong?"

"I--I..." The words were just as frozen in place as I felt, "I'm not ready...right now."

He smiled. "Okay. I understand." He kissed me again but it was very gently.

I sat up slowly, knowing my face probably looked miserable. It's not that I didn't want to...continue, I just truly wasn't ready and didn't want to rush into that. It was a big deal...for me.

"I'm sorry." I looked down at the floor as Steven sat up as well.

"You don't need to be Lily. It's okay. Trust me." He reached out for my hand.

"Come on then Picasso, let me see this drawing." I changed the subject quickly. Don't say too much, stay guarded, I had to keep myself clear-headed.