Call me Hurricane: A Semi-true and Fucked up Story

Chapter 3 : "He's a Lady, You are a Lesbian."

Let me start by defining Intersex for you, "a general term used for a variety of conditions in which a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn't seem to fit the typical definitions of female or male."

Now for the kids out there that are my age this is where you would imagine the "The More You Know" rainbow flying across the page or screen, however you are reading this. Evan is Sarah and Evan and Sarah at the same time. Confusing mess let me start with Evan had a penis a regular one that worked irregular due to bad surgery from turning his vagina parts into his penis parts, or rather making his penis parts larger. It's confusing lets just stop talking about his penis at least to the part where I give details about our sex life.

Of course this fact did not change our friendship, Evan and I still hung out and spent time together as much as we could. In order not to make myself look worse I will skip over how and when we became romantic, I mean I already admitted to being a possible criminal and you can already make out that I cuss like a sailor. Sometime after he told me his secret up to the time after I moved in with Evan to get out of Kyle's house,  Evan and I officially became Evan and I.

The relationship went pretty smooth in the beginning both of us working and spending every waking hour together work home work home work home....your getting this right. NO TIME APART. And this is where I am thinking do they want a whole chapter on my three days in a mental hospital at this time and I am going with, YES YOU DO. If you don't then tough shit skip it, I will label it well for you I promise.

Yes, Relationship right. The sex was amazing because we could go for hours at a time, and I lived in the blissful ignorance he was getting something out of it for awhile. Now I don't think I am the hottest woman on the face of the planet, but after nearly two hundred sexual partners I know what I am doing in bed at least. The thing is when your with someone who does not have sexual parts that function like ninety percent of the population you can throw a lot of your tricks out the window, Standard blow job, no feeling, that thing you can do with the muscles in your vagina, NO FEELING.

Evan prefers it in the ass, and yes part of me badly wants to write that on a bathroom wall. I won't though because I generally feel that might cross the childish line. I knew that he was bisexual from the beginning but I didn't know he liked it in the ass more than anything. Guess what the problem was boys and girls. I DON'T HAVE A PENIS. I live my life strictly in the dick department so the idea of using a strap on did not have the appeal I think he wish it had. Plus we were too broke to buy one. I don't think I have ever been so happy to be that broke and don't think I will be happier to be that broke again.

I am sure at this point you are seeing the slow decent into the pile of shit this relationship was becoming. Added to this my work began the slow push to get me out of the company, beginning with cutting my department and moving me into a job I was not trained for nor ready to do. Which led to a small stay in a mental hospital which led to Evan not working first with led to me not working later. Now we were both unemployed and spending all our time together. Evan and I are both lazy people, I am lazy in a I don't want to do it but I will do it kind of way and Evan is lazy in the I don't want to do it so let me lie to not do it or just not do it type of lazy. Evan spent all his time ignoring me at some point and began spending all his time online drawing manga porn for 4Chan and playing army games with twelve year old kids. I began to pick up odd jobs for money from lawn care, to home repair to blow jobs. But Evan, didn't even help with the household chores.

Blow jobs, yes I took a small turn into blowing men for money, not proud of that but it was easy money. At forty dollars for eight minutes of my time it was the quickest way to make a few bucks. I only did it a couple of times and I did it with Evan knowing and in the house playing video games. Hey I never said I didn't help put corn into the shit that our relationship had become. 

Next up, More of the beginning of the end.