Chapter Eleven
"KIM...KIM," Shouted a sobbing Cheryl running after me. Why was she doing this, why was she following me, I should be the one begging for her forgivness, I just got her into a state, kissed her and then ran off, some friend I am, why the *Duck* did I lean in? Well I guess I knew exactly why.
"Kim, you atleast owe me an explanation what is this?" She shouted, catching up with me.
I turned towards her, her beautiful face trickling with tears, tears because of me."Cheryl, your the most perfect person in the whole world, your the first real friend I've ever had, which is why I can't see you for a bit, I'm sorry, it's just to complicated right now." Now my eyes welling up and my voice breaking.
"We can forget about the kiss," She pleaded.
"You can Cheryl, but I can't, thats the problem." I turned away once more, towards my room, managing to keep my tears in until then. This time she didn't follow me, why would she, I had just broken a broken women more. I'm Kimberley, and at the moment I hate myself.
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I didn't see Cheryl the next morning before me and the other girls headed back towards the airport. I had got no sleep atall that night, I had just led there, crying, I've never felt so drained, but who am I to feel sorry for myself, after what I did to Cheryl, but I was scared, never ever when I had kissed someone had I got that feeling, never before had 'friendly' touches been so arousing, never before had I needed someone as much as I needed Cheryl, I was scared, she was changing me for the better, and I didn't know how to cope. I wanted to text her, tell her how sorry I was, but how could I get all that I was feeling across in a text, it would be pathetic, but I couldnt exactly go visit her, I didn't know what to do, but I know I had made this mess, so I had to clear it up.
We had about a month before the live shows, most of the work for the first two weeks would be done with the show's behind the scenes crew, like the creative directors and and the vocal coaches. We had all moved into the contestants house and it was a nice house, but I couldn't fully appreciate it, I really missed her and I knew at anytime I would be called up, and told to wait for a car ready to meet Cheryl for our first 'Official' Live show meeting, I was petrified, how would she even look me in the eye? How would I look her in the eye!? I didn't have to wait long to find out, sure enough two weeks before the start of the Live shows, I was told it was time to meet Cheryl, to decide on songs, outfits and what direction I wanted to go in etc. *Ducking* Hell. Was all I could feel on the journey to the studios, should I hug her, should I even smile!? I had no idea how she was feeling towards me, I don't see why she would want to be anywhere near me to behonest.
"Right wel let's get this over with quickly," She said, before I even had a chance to greet her. "I know your style, and you would suit most genres, first week is 'musical heroes' so for you Im thinking a Whitney song possibly Where do broken hearts go? Cheesy yes, but public like cheese, I'l run it by the vocal coaches and see what they think, but take it that your doing that song, unless you hear any different. Agreed?" It was clear she didn't want to be anywhere near me, she wanted me to do well, I was her act, but she could hardly even look at me, what had I done.
"Cheryl, I jus-,"
She quickly cut me off, "Are you agreed, Kimba, I mean Kimberley?"
"Agreed," I sighed, trying to hold the tears back.
"Okay then, well then we have no more to discuss, the stylist has chosen a few outfits for you, and I've picked the ones I think are suitable, so I - so someone will drop them round to the house and you can decide yourself,"
I merely nodded. "Cheryl, I'm sorry, You don't under-,"
"I've got nothing else to say to you Kimberley," Her face not showing the slightest bit of emotion. She picked up her oversized bag, put on her sunglasses and walked out of the studio, leaving me, like I had left her feeling alone, numb and distraught.
