A Look In The Window That Appears To Reflect

Awaiting

The worst thing to do in my life is to wake up

To wake up is to know I'm still alive

alive and well

healthy but in pain

waking up is a reminder

It's a confirmation the dream I was in was exactly as expected

A dream

When I wake up I am no longer full of strength

I am no longer living in safety

in a fantasy created by my very own mind

I wake up to a nightmare

home

My father yells and screams because in this world I am not what I seem

I'm the bad guy, the villain even

but in my dreams, I am free to sore, I am the hero if I so desire

Or the one in need of aid

I could even be a nobody but at least I am alive. 

But once I awaken from my nightly peace I am the villain yet again

I am the one who creates the problems

All just by being there

by simply being alive

I close myself off in my room, like a beast locked in a cage

Awaiting a hero to rescue me

to welcome me home with open arms

Alas, I am the beast and I shall not be rescued

In the eyes of the people around me, I do not deserve to be rescued.

I shall just be there awaiting an improbable event

an impossible saviour to come

I silently hope that one day

I can be saved and taste freedom for the first time in my life.

No longer the beast, trapped and afraid

I am yet awaiting my happily ever after that may never truly come.

Blite's quote of the day:
"Never say goodbye, because saying goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting."

~Peter Pan~