Death. That always come to mind when seeing every other perfect person around you. People ask "why do you do it?" The answer is simple...simply beacause I'm not happy. When the blood flows down my arms touching my past scars I become happy. The pain heals the depression. Wait no it doesn't because in order for me to be happy I have to love myself, which Is quite impossible.
I saw my perfect bestfriend run to me in joy that her crush asked her out. I was truly happy for her. But I also envied her life in every way, she never had problems she was 100% confident, she was absolutely beautiful, had an amazing voice, her hair was flawless, amazingly athletic, and super thin, did I mention she has straight A's because she does. Well her name is Mariah. Wondering when she was going to drop me like everyone else did. If it wasn't for her I'd be dead right now.
My problems continue to grow by the second. Im ugly, Im short, My hair is a mess, Im fat, Im have straight D's. Although maybe my grades our because of stress. But I do know that the guy I like likes me back but he doesn't wanna ask me out because he's seen my scars. He comes over at night and we talk which is nice at times. Did I mention he's abusive and so is my father but oh well there's not much I can do.
"Hey fatass move!!" I heared alexia's voice shout at me from behind. "yes ma'am" I quiver in fear as she takes my phone, the only sanity I have left. "Where's your supposedly called "boyfriend" Tyler?!?" "leave her alone alexia!" I heard the one man I loved at school Tyler. Amazing blue eyes beautiful blonde hair and kindest heart at times. "Hey Tyler." I say in thy most timid voice ever. He finally took a stand for me and kissed me. But then I saw...I saw mariah...remembering her crush was Tyler... "Mariah wait!!!" I saw tears form in her eyes she took off running as her self confidence fell right behind
her. "She was the last ounce of will to live I had...I can't lose her...I..I..I just can't." I whispered to myself running right after not caring if people judged my actions. "Wow you like a total slut, Tyler that's a new low, even for you." alexia said to tyler in the most disgust voice she could find.
