i remember looking out at the world. the grass swayed in the wind. each blade blended together to create waves. i remember falling in love. not with a boy, nor with myself. it was with the earth. i saw the grass dance like i only thought the ocean could do. high up in the mountains the air is different. it feels different. you breathe in nature. its happiness. looking out the earth curves. youre surrounded by forest, the shades are viridescent and seem like they never end. the earth around you curves. its humbling; reminding you that youre your own planet, star, or galaxy. you are beautiful and handsome and vibrant and unique. you are different than anyone else but you are not alone. There may be some similarities some where in the universe but every galaxy, star, planet, and moon is unique even if the remarkable quality is where it is located in space. you are a star. together they make constellations and there are so many stars. once you step away from the lights and the hustle and bustle you can see more. its a beautiful feeling to breathe in and look up to the sky in the dead of night to see pinpricks of radiance shining through. call to mind how i mentioned the oceans waltz. the way it pulls in and pushes out. your feet are on the dry sand and it slides around your feet. closer to the ocean you go the softer the sand becomes. your feet squish into it, it feels nice. if you pay closer attention to it youll notice the grains scratching into your skin. but you dont look closer and just enjoy the feeling. the tide comes up and you walk further into it. the water gently caresses your legs and the splash stings your body but it feels good. it pulls down begging you to come. but this, the sea salt in the air and water pulling for you and the sand, this is what i love. i want to see more of the world i live in. i want to see everything. behind my eyes is my mind. it is an overgrown jungle. thoughts tangled up and spilling out at every angle. ideas growing from the patchy light streaming in. There is an entrance to let someone peek inside, its not that hard to find. although it is hard to throw stuff out. i do fear that one might cut down my branches, clip off the new leaves of ideas. there are thorns on the interior that make it hard for me to get out. its dark in there, the light cant get through. even i get stuck on occasions. my mind thinks and thinks and thinks. but often times i speak without thinking. words bubble their way out of my lips like when you crack open a shaken soda. sometimes i giggle and the sound dribbles out like rain on a window. other times i bark out a laugh like the explosion of a firework. i love how fireworks sound and light up the night. i love love and loving things and humans and animals. i love how it feels when a cat walks up to you and plops down right on your tummy. this little fur balls warmth right on you. the happiness from it choosing you is another wonderful thing. i love reading. more than reading i love when i find a book so well written i cant stop devouring it. there's a fire in my soul that takes those words and burns them into ash, those words keep it alive. i love this. rambling, writing, breathing. i love the way sitting outside in the morning feels. when youre by your lonesome and its not lonely. the sun is warming, gentle.
and after all this i still want to say a few more things. someone once said that "falling in love is like giving someone a loaded gun aimed at your heart and trusting them not to pull the trigger." but i dont agree with that. love, to me, isnt harsh. its not dangerous. love isnt giving them a gun, its allowing someone to hold you. it may be spine tingling to let yourself feel and be open with another human. but its not dangerous, its humane, its soft. love can laugh in passion and be just as strong without screaming it.
