The Horan Dream

somethings just dont wrk out

(authors note: yeah I know this is really late I'm sorry... I kinda got, um, distracted, yeah distracted aha)

(Current date- GEORGIE' POV)

"Its not happening is it" I sighed to my husband . He took one look at my sad, broken body and stood up making his way over to the heap of limbs that he called his wife. He took my hand lovingly and sat back down next to me, bring my crying mess into his comforting arms. I lent into his toned frame and let my head fall onto his chest, hearing his heartbeat that was slightly irregular with worry and sadness for our failing family that be both wanted. We both knew something was wrong. Two years and three months we've been trying, two years and three months we've cried over our negative sign and after two years and three months, something should have happened, surely? I leaned in closer to his body, soaking up the warmth, trying to gain some sort of energy to pull myself together. I found nothing.

"we can try again princess" Niall croaked, indicating to me he too had shed a few tears. "we can try again, we'll try as many times as it takes to have our children in our arms baby, that I can promise you" he continued, starting to rub my back in a comforting motion. I was anything but comforted. I was hurting, why wasn't I getting pregnant? It was a horrible lingering thought that had been dancing in my confused head making me feel isolated from everything else for weeks. I sighed and brought myself to my feet, using Niall for support. He too stood up and brushed the new creases out of his neatly ironed clothes and followed me as I tiredly walked out of the ensuite bathroom and into the floor length windowed bedroom we shared. Sitting down on the bed, I fell back and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, feeling a release of emotion and anxiety.

"Ni"

"yeah baby"

"what happens now? we can't go on with this, it's hurting us" I implied, feeling better for talking about my worries. Niall took one look at me sprawled out across the bed and began the walk from his spot to me , where he laid down next to me and rolled onto his side and brought his hand to my face and pulled back a stray bit of hair and placed it behind my small ear. He let a smile fall onto his face as he leaned down and pressed a kiss to my lips; he pulled back for a second before I grabbed the back of his head where his hair had fallen messily and pulled him back to where our lips had met before.

"you're so beautiful Mrs Horan" he said breathlessly as he spread kisses down my neck gently, slowly bringing himself up to my face where he swiftly continued his work. I rolled on top of him feeling his long guitar-playing fingers being placed on my waist , firmly holding me in that spot. I granted entrance as he ran his tongue slid across my plump lips. I was enjoying this, but I still wasn't sure. That's why when Niall turned us over, me being at the bottom, I stopped him.

"Niall I don't know"

"baby come on , i need you" Niall replied un-patiently , leaning down to resume where he left off.

"no Niall, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have led you on. I can't do this again. I'm fed up of the disappointment and misery. I don't want another negative. I can't have another. I see the pain in your eyes Niall, I hate it. its destroying us" I said a tear rolling down my cheek. Niall looked at me and sighed, slid off me ,onto the bed and led there. All that could be heard was the ticking of the clock from down the long , narrow hall and the steady beating of our hearts. It felt like hours before one of us spoke and I'm pretty sure the bed cover had now drowned in my tears.

"so that's it, were not going to have children. you're giving up on them. or were you talking about us?" Niall answered rather angrily. I flinched at his tone of voice and sat up, watching my husband make his way over to the door.

"where are you going?" I asked unsure of what to say.

"I'm going out. don't wait up" and the door slammed with angry, fast footsteps following.

What have I done? ugh Georgie you're so stupid. Go after him. No give him space. I don't know, I'm so confused. I can hear my phone ringing out but It gets shoved to the back of my head where everything else un-important to my life gets put. but I can't concentrate. Its whining. Ring . Ring. Ring. "Go away!" I shout, hoping for the phone to hear but it keeps playing its tune. Frankie's tune. But she's not here, she's doing promo living her dream with her band Storm Warning. But still I find myself grabbing the phone and pressing the lit green button. "hel..l..o" I answer, mentally face palming myself for sounding so ugly.

"hey, hey I know. ?" I hear her soothing voice say, bringing a light smile to my face. "Niall's okay sweetie. He's with my lot. I think harry said something about Arthur jumping all over uncle Niall to make him happy." I laughed. She could always make me laugh, something a best friend has I suppose.

"thanks" I said drying my tears "how's Ireland?" I asked politely, bringing myself to an acceptable sate.

"oh Georgie it's amazing. but I can't wait to get home. I miss my boys and my best friend. The fans over here are crazy" she chuckled " I should be coming home tomorrow so make sure you have time for me ho bag." oh how I loved this girl.

"I've always got time for you" I replied honestly and as the conversation started to fade out and goodbyes were said I got up from my spot and walked down stairs, staring longingly out the window and down the drive to were my car was firmly parked in the drive. I wanted to go see him but I know we need a break. All our emotions would just eat away at us and our relationship. I love this boy but I just wished that I could give him what he wanted, what he deserved. What if it is me? I couldn't live with myself. I slowly went upstairs and into the bathroom, peeling off my tear stained clothes and drew up a much needed bath, soaking into it and finding the warmth and comfort I desired. I wanted cuddles . I wanted cuddles with my Niall. I wanted cuddles with my Niall as we sat outside on our porch swing, my back against his chest whilst he held me in the place I belong. We would just sit contently as the swing slowly swayed back and forth with the beat of Niall's low humming. He would occasionally press a light kiss to my head as I smiled happily and snuggled down further, bringing the blanket that covers us higher as we watch the candles on the table flicker. yeah I wanted cuddles. and I wanted it with my man .