If Ye Had A Chance To Change Yer Fate... Would Ye? (PROBABLY GONNA CHANGE LATER)

Cigarettes.

~**~ Hey Readers! It's the author speaking to you (obvii), before we get into this mess of a story. First of all, thanks for picking my story to read. I'm glad it interested you! Secondly, this story MAY CONTAIN SOME TOUCHY SUBJECTS. An example would be DEPRESSION. So I really hope none of you guys get offended in anyway with what this story talks about. I have personal experiences with these subjects, so please don't think I'm just writing about it just because. Also, these stories will constantly be updated, usually because something doesn't make sense :P Anyway, thanks and enjoy the story! -ADP ~**~

"One chance..." I began saying, as I fiddled with a lighter. It took me a few flicks until I got it to burn. Quickly, I put my cigarette near the flames and when it lit, I gently placed it in my mouth. I inhaled. Goodness gracious... if I could correctly explain the feeling I get when I breathe in this delicious smoke, I'd write a whole book about the whole wonderful thrill. Exhaling was a whole different feeling. It felt as if my lungs were having their own orgasm. As if the poisoning air I gave them were something they longed for. They needed it. And frankly, so did I.

I continued the inhale and exhale process until my cigarette was nothing but a mere speck of dust.

Just in time too, for my sister just came home from work.

"Seán?" She says curiously, obviously seeing that the back porch door was wide open.

I just sit there. I don't care to greet her. She makes her way to where I'm located and notices that I've been smoking.

"Seriously, Seàn? Again? I thought you were going to quit!" She hissed at me.

"Quit? I said I'd only quit if things got better for me... Which it obviously hasn't." I barked. "So I'm not quitting."

"Ugh... Seán..." Her voice calmed down drastically. I fuckin envy her for being able to be so sympathetic, after practically screaming at me a second before.

She continued, "Seán... Please... just talk to me. You say all of these things... And yet you don't seek help. I know somethin ain't right with you. Ever since you entered 10th grade, you've become this... Emotional basturd..."

Emotional basturd. Is that what she thinks this is? That I'm some Emo kid seeking attention?

I stayed silent, knowing some of what she said was partly true. When I turned 16, my life just started spiraling down. I thought I was the king of the world, in all honestly. Hell, was I wrong.

When I was 16 I got my ears pierced, my eyebrow pierced, and I lost my virginity. All in the same year. At the time, all of these things seemed like a great idea. I felt so fuckin badass. As if I was the only 16 year old who dared to have sex, or to get piercings... Now that I look back at my idiotic actions... Ugh, Fuck...

I need a cigarette.

"Seán... I worry about you..." My sister says, after she too became silent when I had no other words. I'd always have something clever to say in return when she got on my nerves. But... What's the point anymore? To fight back... To speak... Ugh, I need a cigarette. Now.

"You've completely disconnected yerself from the family!" Her voice rises.

Another lecture? Great. Exactly what I need. 

Not wanting to hear anything else she had to say, I stood up and calmly walked back into the house. It reeked of Febreez and a bunch of cleanin supplies. Let me tell ya', my damn sister was such a clean freak. Ya' smoke in the house once and ya' never hear the end of it. Pfft.

I go to my room, which my sister never ever bothered to go into. A perfect man-cave in situations like these. I loved being in here. It's my safe haven, honestly.

Hearing my sister angrily shut the back porch door behind her, I put my headphones on and start up my PS3. I insert the game "Dark Souls" and play for a while.

Playing video games really helps me get my thoughts together. They also prevent me from taking another cigarette.

After awhile, playing Dark Souls can get a little boring... even though it may be my second favorite game of all time. Shadow Of The Colossus will always hold a special place in my heart, or frankly, what's left of it. 

So, I quickly set up a makeshift tripod for my shitty camera.

On my downtime, which is basically all the time, I record videos of myself playing video games. It sounds dumb when you say it audibly, but it seriously de-stresses me.

I post these videos on YouTube, where my small (but awesome) "fan base" of 100,000 subscribers are, waiting for my next upload. But let me be perfectly clear, I'm definitely not as amazing as Markiplier, or those other big Youtubers. Not at all. They're just... He's just... somethin else, y'know? It's as if Mark were born with talent, and he was meant for YouTube commentary. He's the one who really inspired me to begin YouTube, actually.

Mark has probably over 7 million subscribers on YouTube! That's totally insane. I've been subscribed to him for over a year already, and somehow he's still the only human to make me want to get up in the morning.

~**~ Hey Again, Readers! This is my first chapter of this story. Sorry if it got boring towards the end, I just really wanted to explain what Seán was doing and how he was thinking and his actions, ect. If you have any suggestions, please leave some feedback for me! It's much appreciated! Thanks and I'll see you... In the next chapter! Bye-Bye! :)) -ADP ~**~