Terrible Things

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She sits awake every night while everyone else is fast asleep. She thinks about the past, her childhood wasn't bad. She doesn't understand why she feels like this is her only option. She sets the blade down and rest her face in her bloody hands and begins to cry. She thinks about her best friend and how she begs her not to do this, not to end her life. She thinks about what would happen if her mom saw her this way. She wants to know the love of a boy but settles for perverts online. She wishes her family would see through her fake smile and always happy appearance. Her friends at school don't know. She hates herself for how well she hides it. She wonders if it's all in her head. She only gets bullied from the girl in the mirror. Thinking about her baby sister she begins to cry more. Tears and blood all over the bed, all over her body. The tears make the cuts sting but she doesn't mind the pain. She prays her baby sister will never know the pain of the sharp cold metal on her wrist, her hips, her legs. Her shoulders. She grows week thinking about all the times she's made herself puke. She wonders if her sister in the next room can hear her crying. She closes her eyes and try's to sleep. The next day at school nobody notices her foggy red eyes from her sleepless night. She lives with her headphones in, dreading another night in her room alone. That girl.... Is me.

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