maybe later

what happens after

i'm not sure if this is okay to say,

it goes against my religion

what i'm supposed to believe in.

everything about our own doomsday.

all these thoughts and so much space,

in an environment where nobody questions such a thing.

never have they ever questioned the existence of someone,

someone we're not even supposed to question in the first place.

this could be it,

our entire life, right here on this earth.

but time never stops for us, not for anyone

so our souls grow old, too old and grand it's lost our fit.

we've become so dependant on afterlife

to the point where we conflict ourselves with different beliefs,

we're not even completely sure it exists.

if heaven even exists for eternal life.

it could all just be fake,

everything i've been surrounded by,

what if it's just false hope.

maybe it's all just a dream and we're not all awake.

but we keep hoping for more,

because there has got to be more than this.

our lives are only so short,

we want to reassure ourselves that there's something to try for.

i mean, there has to be something more significant than this, right?

better than all of the suffering on this earth,

all of the suicidal thoughts, all of the sadness.

a utopia we might've made up, where we convince ourselves "we'll be alright"

"just keep on waiting", they said.

but what if this is it,

or maybe there is something out there, something far from us.

how could we know, nobody comes back from the dead.

unless there is, but if there is, there's got to be a hell too.

something just as parallel, something just as strong.

a place for people who didn't do so well.

standards they've never lived up to.

they say there's no pain in heaven.

no sadness, no madness

just complete utter happiness.

if i go to hell, and my lover go to heaven

would they completely forget about me.

because there's no pain in heaven,

no sadness, no madness,

just happiness and satisfaction.

maybe i'd be more content if i knew an afterlife didn't exist.

not worrying if i'm going to forget someone or if someone is going to forget me.

but whatever happens after,

i hope you're okay with it.

seeing as heaven is only fit for an angel such as yourself.

but whatever happens after,

i hope i don't forget you,

seeing as you're not in my life anymore, the least i can do is remember you.

but despite what happens after,

i only hope you're happy now,

seeing as tomorrow is never guaranteed, or if it will even exist.

-IP