PRACTICALLY MUNDANE

D1

"...You miss the feeling when you step outside
And then your mind comes all untied
And then you open up your eyes
And you don't feel lonely
And it feels bad now but it's gonna get better
Someday..."
                    - Wakey Wakey (Almost Everything)

Don't you find every song either speaks to you or you don't hear it at all? It resonates or fades, well here goes, a small tale; hopefully concluding in a full stop.

I loved you...
I loved you for so long.
I didn't realise you were changing.
I loved the idea of you and I.
I fell in love with you at first sight.
I never admitted my love, not even to myself.
One day I couldn't keep it in;
I gave in to you.
I dived head first off that cliff.

You were my future
I saw you... my present, my future, my forever

Forever.
Full stop - no semi colon

Forever was the strike of a match
Lit me up inside, burnt bright; the end
Forever changed
Never the same
The end?

I read somewhere that letting go isn't about a person or time it's letting go of the future you've seen for yourself. Letting go of the person you've become and the person you were hoping to grow into, it's letting go of a future without the idea:person:time you always pictured.

I haven't managed to completely "let go"

I still picture you when I close my eyes.

A friend recently said think of the beach, of the rolling waves, the surf touching your toes, the bronze sunset, darkening of the sky, a brilliant crest on the horizon.
Can you picture it?
Are your eyes close?
_I see it. Oh I see it alright; down to the size of the sand grains, tangible salt in the air, a breeze sending a chill down my spine and the person I always imagined by my side_
...Not exactly what I wanted to picture but exactly what I hard wired my brain into wanting...
Letting go

Anyone with tips other than "time"? I know you mean well but "time" takes time and in that period you fool yourself into thinking it's okay, you cry a thousand times, you feel better off, you question if it was love, you question if it was enough, you imagine the past better than it actually was and when you're down you see it worse than the reality.

I think when I get used to a different reality, a different image, that is the day I'll be free of my past. I will have let go - "now I'm chuckling to myself - silly right?"
I hope to never picture you again,
I hope to leave our past in my past,
I hope to never look back,
I want to be free "between you and I, I am the only one holding myself back - yikes"
I want to let go.
No semicolon.